Before the Fall
by prisslyn
Summary: Bellarke. This is my version of life on the ark. Clarke met Octavia and Bellamy before the 100 were sent to the ground. Octavia found a friend and Bellamy may have found someone to love. Rate M for language and possible lemons in later chapters.
1. Chapter 1

Chapter 1

The room was too bright, the air too thin. Clarke tried to steady her hands as the cold settled into her like a bucket of ice shot into her veins. _No! No! This will not define me, this will not keep happening to me. I am stronger than this! I am strong._ She opened her eyes and her blue eyes took in the scene.

Her voice was sure as she commanded two of the guards to bring the next victim to her table. Her mother had taught her to instruct people to do what she needed. The command left no doubt that she was in charge, at least until her mother was available. This wasn't supposed to happen so soon. She was still a medical apprentice, a trainee, but with her mother evaluating the people with the worst injuries, it was her job to decide what to do with the people leftover. The explosion had decimated factory station's population. Seven were dead, twelve critical and three were in pain, but not on death's door. Her mother was tending to the five of the twelve that were about to die in mere minutes. That left ten for her to evaluate the others. Jackson was helping her mother with the more critically injured.

Clarke set her shoulders as she looked at the young mechanic. Her hair was the color of whiskey and she had bright green eyes. Or used to. Half of her face was fused to the jacket which she had thrown over her body in order to protect it from the flames. Her hands were blackened and peeling. Some parts of fingers were glistening white with bone exposed. The rest of her body was covered in debris and third degree burns. Her breath was coming in shallow gasps as she tried to twist and turn away from the pain. She wasn't going to make it. Even if her body didn't go into shock, the amount of antibiotics to stop infection from setting in was three times the normal medical ration. She wasn't going to make it. But Clarke could make it better.

Clarke's hand cupped the young woman's unmarred cheek, "What's your name?" She asked as met the frightened girl's gaze without flinching.

"Sam." The girl wheezed out between one gasp and the other.

"That's a pretty name. I'm Clarke." She whispered and smiled brightly in the face of her pain. The girl tried to smile back, but it was half a grimace. Clarke readied the syringe and gently gave the girl the morphine shot. The girl quit trying to toss and turn to make the pain go away. Her whimpering hushed as the morphine did its job and slowly quieted Sam's screaming nerves. The agony began to bleed away. Clarke monitored her breathing until it began to slow down until the girl barely moved. Sam's body lay still as her heart rate flatlined and the screeching singular beep droned in Clarke's ears.

Clarke memorized the girl's features as she pulled the blanket over Sam's face. She would never forget Sam, because she had been her first patient and the first patient she lost. She would see this as more as she became the Ark's doctor and she needed to make her heart stone. Every doctor lost patients, but in this world, it was a not only inevitable, but a necessity. As doctors, they made the hard decisions.

Abby Griffin came walking in, wiping the blood from her hands as she looked at her daughter covering up a victim on the operating table.

"Trainee, report." Abby barked. Clarke wasn't supposed to be treating patients, but she had ignored Abby's orders and had begun to treat patients without either Jackson or her on standby. Abby couldn't afford to coddle Clarke in this arena. She had to treat her like any other apprentice.

Clarke sighed, "Third degree burns over 85 percent of her body. At least one broken femur and she had lost at least half her blood supply." Abby nodded.

"Did she die on the table or did you help her along?" Abby hated the practice, but she herself had been faced with that decision on more than one occasion. Let the patient live and suffer or help ease their pain so they didn't die crying out in pain. It went against everything she had been taught as a doctor, but this wasn't the perfect world they were living in and she had learned the hard way that sometimes not fighting was the kinder choice.

"What do you think?" Clarke met her mother's eye with stubbornness and her own hatred of what she had done.

"Triage the other three and then go home. Jackson and I can handle the rest." Clarke nodded and took off her examination gloves.

Clark numbly walked towards what was home. The small three-room cubicle she shared with her mother since her father had been floated. Things had not been the right between them since that moment. Her mother had moved them to one of the smaller units designated for single parents. Clarke didn't mind, it was actually refreshing to not be surrounded by memories of her father.

She continued down the hallway and turned left picking up speed. She could feel a panic attack coming on, the hallway seemed smaller, tightening around her more with every second. She needed to be in the safety of her own room when she finally broke down. As she picked up speed she wasn't looking where she was going. Between one second and the next she was looking up from the floor at the person she had slammed into.

A guard, no, she shook her head to clear it, a cadet. He looked as bewildered as she felt. He kept staring at her like she had grown another head, "Sorry, didn't mean to slam into you. I wasn't looking where I was going." Clarke stammered.

"It's okay." He murmured and reached down to help her stand.

"Thanks, I got it." Clarke popped back up like nothing had happened a stupid smile plastered on her face. It was the fake smile she used for when she had to attend an event that required the one of the council member's children to be present. It was the mask she used to show the outside world she was fine. She hurried around the corner and slipped inside her front door and felt the shakes coming.

Closing her bedroom door she sank to the floor and felt the tears begin to fall. This had been happening ever since she had lost her father. Jaha, The Chancellor himself, one of her family's closest friends, had floated him for trying to do the right thing. She had been held in solitary ever since that fateful day, but randomly one day The Chancellor decreed she was released from the criminal sanctions due to her age and the fact that she had to continue her training as a medical apprentice in order to become a doctor for the next generation. Jaha had certain rules, she could never break the law again, she must continue her training and she could never tell another soul what she knew about the life support of The Ark. Clarke had only agreed, because Jaha had said that everyone involved would have to be floated if the truth came out. That included her mother. Clarke and her mother hadn't been close since her father was floated, but she still loved her mom. She couldn't bear it if she was the reason that her mom was killed.

Clarke looked at her hands trembling. The tremors started in her hands and travelled up her arms until her whole upper torso was quaking with the terrible feeling. Every patient she had treated since her father died was him. She saw him staring up at her, begging her to save him.

 _I don't know if I can do this._ She thought to herself. _You have to. Otherwise you die and so does your mother._ Another voice in her head shouted. She covered her ears and began to sob until she cried herself to sleep against the door.

* * *

Bellamy just stood there. He couldn't believe that had actually happened. The princess of the Ark, Clarke Griffin, had just smashed into him and then run off like the devil himself goosed her. He was lucky no one saw or he could've gotten written up. Everyone on the Ark loved Clark Griffin like she was a celebrity. Hence the name Princess.

He sighed as he opened the door to O's smiling face. She was sitting at the lone table in the middle of room working on one of her projects. The medium changed daily, but his sister never stopped doodling, creating or making something out of nothing. She brought beauty into the world in every way and he hated that she couldn't shine for anyone but him and their mother.

"What you up to this time, O?" Octavia looked at her big brother and beamed while holding up an I.D. Sleeve. Everyone on the Ark from the littlest babe to the oldest adult always had to carry their I.D. card at all times. He looked at the sleeve that had been hand sewn from old scraps of discarded clothing their mother must've thrown away when sewing up uniforms and such. The material matched his cadet uniform, but was tougher. Sewn into the back was "Bellamy Blake". He smiled.

"It's beautiful. Just like you." He one armed hugged her and looked down at her other project she was currently working on.

Octavia caught his eyesight and her smiled softened a little, "I thought I might make one for me. Who knows, maybe one day, I can get an I.D. The law could change." Bellamy sighed. She knew the truth as did he. Their mother had beaten it into them long before she was even old enough to understand the words. He should lecture her, but he couldn't crush her last shred of hope. That wasn't who he was.

He crouched down on his haunches and touched her cheek gently while she continued to work diligently, "Yeah, maybe they will." He was rewarded with a small smile.

O continued to work quietly while he walked into his bedroom and began to strip down. This latest training shift had been particularly sadistic. The other cadets had never been friendly, but he was pretty sure now a gang of them had it in for him. He rotated his shoulder and winced when pain shot from under his chest and made his breath his out between clenched teeth. He tenderly touched the place where Jared had punched him in the side during a sparring session and tried not to double over when the pain slashed at him again.

"Damnit." He cursed quietly. Jared either fractured or broke one of his ribs. That bastard really hated him. He'd have to be more careful in the future. Sighing he laid back on bed and looked at the gray metal ceiling. Octavia continued to bustle about the living room as he counted his breaths. His little sister made this all worth it. If and when he became a guard, he could find a way to let her see all things she dreamed of. She wouldn't be a prisoner forever, he'd make sure of it.

* * *

"Billy, all done. Look at how brave you were." Clarke talked to the little boy who was still sniffling from the vaccination she had to administer. Her mother had given her the task of giving the latest round of vaccinations to the five through seven year olds. It was tedious work, but she actually relished it after all the injuries of late. She couldn't take another trauma case. And luckily, Billy here, didn't necessitate any kind of care above giving him a bandaid and a smile.

Billy's teacher smiled and took Billy by the underarms and led him out to wait with the other children of his class.

"ABBY! ABBY! Incoming trauma case!" Jackson shouted. Clarke's mother came out of her office and Clarke followed her to the trauma room located right across from the non-emergency waiting area.

"What happened here?" Abby asked calmly as two cadets were brought in on stretchers. One had a deep bullet wound in his leg and the other was beaten to pulp, wheezing through two cracked teeth.

"A cluster fuck." Shumway growled as a third boy limped in. He wasn't on a stretcher, but he was hurt.

"Clarke, you take the cadet standing. I'll work on these. The bullet might've kicked his artery. Jackson, I need dressing," Jackson nodded in response and started to grab everything she called for.

Clarke nodded to the cadet who was standing. He was cradling his left side, "This way please. I'll see you in here." Shumway followed behind the cadet watching Clarke and him closely. "Please have a seat there." Clarke motioned to the examination table.

"He isn't hurt as bad as Jared and Darin. Just slap a bandaid on him and let me take him in," Shumway explained while he hovered and watched the cadet.

She ignored Shumway with ease, "What's your name?" Clarke asked the cadet as she flicked a pen light in front of his brown eyes.

"Bellamy." He mumbled.

"Bellamy, please follow the light without turning your head." He did as instructed.

"Clarke, seriously, discharge this troublemaker and I'll get him out of your hair so you can help your mom with Jared and Darrin." Shumway nagged.

"Officer Shumway," Clarke started as she turned and met the officer's gaze. Clarke took one step towards him and Shumway took one step back and gritted his teeth when he realized she had made him look weak. He was actually intimidated by her, "This is my patient. He may be your cadet, but right now I am going to examine him throughly. You need to wait in the waiting room."

"I'm not leaving you alone in a room with him. He's violent, you might get hurt. Then I'd be the idiot who let the councilor's daughter get hurt." He grumbled.

Bellamy's gaze narrowed at Shumway, but didn't say anything. Clarke caught the motion, but didn't say anything, "He hasn't attacked me yet, and all he's done is what I asked."

"That's because I'm here." Shumway responded with his hand on his taser. "He knows what is coming to him."

"I think we'll be alright. If he is violent, I can sedate him. Trust me, he isn't my first violent patient and he won't be my last."

"I'm staying." Shumway didn't budge from the doorway.

"Bellamy, please lift your arms straight overhead." Bellamy tried, but the pain shot through his chest and he coughed, which caused the pain to throb through his entire body. Clarke caught him by the shoulders to steady him. Her hands were gentle as she rubbed circles in his back while he tried to catch his breath.

"Okay, I need this off to do an diagnostic scan and inspect the damage," Clarke indicated his shirt. Bellamy looked at Shumway before moving.

Shumway started to come further into the room. He took Clarke by the forearm, "That's not necessary Clarke. Give him his pain med ration and we'll get out of your hair." His grip tightened on her arm.

Clarke glared at Shumway, "No. Let me go." Shumway released her like her skin was kissed by lightning, "I don't know if he has a concussion. He's my patient and last time I checked, do you have medical training I am unaware of?"

Shumway shook his head, "Then let me care for my patient. Back the hell off." Shumway glared at Bellamy and took his post back at the door.

Clarke turned back to Bellamy, "I'm betting you have a broken rib or two." Bellamy nodded and tried to drag the shirt over his head, but he flinched and his whole body tensed.

"Let me help you." Clarke insisted. She could've cut the shirt off, but it was his cadet uniform and she bet that they didn't have those laying around a lot. Clothes were worn until they were unusable. And being a cadet meant he didn't get much of a salary to buy new clothes. She tugged at the shirt and helped him get his arms through without too much trouble.

Once his chest was revealed, Clarke had to hold in the gasp, but she couldn't stop staring. This hadn't been an ordinary scuffle between cadets. Bellamy's chest and abdomen were covered with deep stab wounds. They weren't bleeding much, and that bothered her. Wounds that deep should be welling up with blood. She counted four different deep stab wounds.

Putting on a pair of gloves, she gently helped him to lay down on the examination table, "I'm going to take a look at these okay? Tell me if what I do hurts okay?"

Bellamy nodded and met her concerned gaze. "Thanks." He said trying not to move too much.

Clarke nodded and met his gaze, "It's going to be alright." She said.

Clarke didn't touch the tender lacerations, but she did peer over and look at them and discovered why they weren't bleeding as they should. He had been stabbed repeatedly with a taser wand. The force of the taser wound had cause the initial tear in the skin, but the heat from the taser electrocuting him had sealed the wound shut. Clarke couldn't help it. He had been brutally stabbed four times and yet he wasn't even asking for pain meds, just keeping his eyes closed.

"Okay. Doing the diagnostic. Please try to keep as still as possible." Clarke pushed a button an a portable scannner beamed above the table where Bellamy laid. "Yup two fractured ribs," She explained.

"What happened to you?" She asked as she took a salve and a q-tip and applied it gently to each wound.

"Training exercise mishap. Nothing more." He said through gritted teeth.

"This was more than a training exercise….who-." She stopped talking when Bellamy gripped her hand like a lifeline. He pleaded with his eyes meeting hers and tightened his grip on her hand. Begging her to understand the need for her not to say anything. She understood, but didn't like it. She took Bellamy's hand and helped him to sit up.

"Well. They shouldn't scar too bad, but the bruising will take a while to go away. The broken ribs, however, are going to be a very painful reminder for a good couple of months. I'll tape you up, but if you start to have pain in your chest or trouble breathing I need you to come back in. Understand?" Bellamy nodded.

"Yeah, he understands," Shumway growled from the corner. Clarke took some tape and gaze from a drawer and began to dress his wounds. She then wound the tape around his torso trying to avoid the tears in his skin as best as possible.

"How's that feel?" She asked pressing the last piece into place.

"Good. Thanks Princess." He mumbled.

"Whoops. Missed that one," She reached up and began to tape a non-existent wound. She put her lips to his ear, "You can trust me." She whispered.

Bellamy froze and felt strange sensation spread through his chest. It wasn't pain, he realized it was comfort. Clarke was comforting him and offering him help. No one had ever reached out a hand to him other than to backhand him with it. His breath caught in throat and he tried not to let her or Shumway know how much her offer meant to him. Shumway couldn't know she wanted to help him. It could get her hurt. Bellamy shut down his face to the emotionless guard face he used during training. It was a bored look that showed his disinterest with everything. With the barest shake of his head for a nod, she accepted that he heard her offer of help.

"Thanks Doc. We'll be going now." Shumway took Bellamy by the arm and jerked him towards the door before Clarke could stop them or say anything.

"Fuck." She whispered. Someone had deliberately hurt Bellamy. She hated abuse in any form, but she didn't know what to do. If Bellamy wouldn't report it, she was out of options. She hadn't witnessed the abuse and she was betting the two other injured cadets were the ones who hurt him. But they were worse off, and one was almost completely dead. She couldn't explain it, but that made her smile.

 _He got his licks in before you hurt him too badly. Good on you, Bellamy._ She looked at her examine table and noticed the discarded shirt. She took the material between her gloved fingers and placed it in the disinfecting bin. It was made to clean and disinfect dirtied scrubs that came into contact with bodily fluids. Clarke turned a knob on the machine that made it clean without destroying the material. It came out a few minutes later clean as a whistle.

She made the decision she would return it to him and extend her offer once more. She couldn't save Sam, couldn't save her father, but Bellamy Blake was still breathing and she'd be damned if she gave up on him.

* * *

Bellamy eased into bed, more sore than he was before going to the doctor. Shumway had smacked him around a little more. He had earned a black eye and punch to the gut, but Shumway let him off easy since he hadn't snitched.

 _Maybe you're cut out for the guard after all, Blake._ Shumway sneered and left Bellamy on the floor gasping from the sucker punch. Bile crawled up his throat. Not only from the punch to the gut, but because he hated the guard and wanted nothing to do with them, but they had power. And he needed that power to protect O.

Pulling himself up he staggered home trying to keep conscious. Luckily, both O and his mom were already asleep by the time he got in. Jared and Darin would be out of commission for a while. He made sure of it. If he had to defend himself he was out on a mission to let everyone on the cadet team know that they fucked with him at their own peril.

He stripped down to his briefs and laid on his bed and stared at the same gray ceiling he had for 23 years, but when he closed his eyes, all he saw were two ice blue eyes staring at him with concern clouding their endless depths. As he let sleep claim him, he didn't remember why he should've made sure he locked the door.

* * *

Arthur's note:

I hope you guys liked my first shot at this. It's been a good long while since I've written any fan fiction for anything, so I'm a bit rusty. Please review.


	2. Chapter 2

Clark rubbed at her temples with exhaustion. The day had been long to begin with, but had started well with the vaccinations. Better to face it head on. Bellamy Blake was nagging at her like a needle in her brain. She couldn't get that look of pure fear in his eyes out of her head. He was terrified, but of what? Shumway? Well yes, he was an ass, but was he the one who hurt him?

 _I need to return his shirt. That is what is bugging me, nothing more._ Clarke rounded the corner and realized she was now in Factory Station. She had made her way from medical without even thinking about it. She had looked up The Blake's address from her office in the medical wing. Factory station always made Clarke feel even more suffocated than Alpha station. The walls seemed tighter, but that was probably just her imagination.

She reached Bellamy's door and knocked softly twice. She knocked again, but no response. Glancing at her watch she realized it was almost midnight. Hanging her head low she realized Bellamy and his mother must be asleep. "Great Clarke. Go ahead, wake 'em up already. It's not like he needs his sleep." Clarke sighed in frustration. He would still have to work tomorrow. That was how it worked on the Ark. Unless you were dead or dying, if you were breathing and could stand on both feet you were expected to work, even if you were nearly killed the night before. He would need his work uniform. Maybe she should leave it outside the door, but clothes were a scare commodity on the Ark. What if someone took it?

She knocked one more time in the hopes Bellamy was still up, but no response. "I'll just leave it right inside the door." She whispered more to herself, hoping the door might be unlocked. "You never know, maybe The Blakes are a trusting sort." She snorted at her own joke, but to her surprise the door was unlocking. Twisting the knob quietly, she opened it to see a small bare table shoved up against the far wall. A couch to the left against the wall and a small console that must've served as a monitor for movies and music when available.

Clarke clutched the shirt to her chest staring at the young woman asleep on the table. The girl had obviously fallen asleep after working herself to exhaustion on her project, whatever it was.

"She's too young to be is mother." Clarke thought aloud. Her whisper must've been too loud because the young girl stirred and bright green bewildered eyes met Clarke's. Octavia gasped loudly. _He has a sister._

"O? What's wrong?" Bellamy opened his door to look at his sister and saw Clarke staring at Octavia. He froze in doorway.

Clarke was still clutching the t-shirt to her chest. She shook herself out of her stupor, "I wanted to return your shirt." Clarke nodded too many times and placed the piece of clothing on the end table within her reach.

Octavia ran at Clarke grasped her hand and pulled her deeper into room and closed the door behind her locking the door. Octavia took Clarke's hand and held it so tightly, "Please don't tell anyone. Please, please please. They can float me, but not mom and Bellamy. Not Mom and Bell," She whispered. She repeated those last four words over and over like a prayer. And Clarke was her only hope.

Bellamy still stood frozen. Clarke looked at Octavia, crying afraid of being floated, afraid for her brother and her mother. Clarke gently patted Octavia's shoulder, "I'm won't tell." She whispered and Octavia nearly collapsed with relief.

Bellamy leapt into action. He took Clarke roughly by the shoulder and pushed her outside, "Get out." Bellamy's voice was a harsh rumble against Clarke's skin.

"Wait! Bel-" Octavia tried to say before Clarke was roughly shoved outside into the hallway by her brother.

Clark stood out in the hallway dumbfounded. She was speechless. There was a hidden second child. There had always been rumors on all the stations about other children, but nothing had ever been found out. _I have to decide what to do._ The rules that she promised Chancellor Jaha she would follow dictated she immediately turn in the Blakes for their secret. If she didn't, she would be in violation of the promise she made. Not that she cared too much about his feelings, but what if he floated her and her mother? But she also knew that certain secrets revealed could destroy families. Not only that, if she told anyone she would be sentencing Bellamy or his mother and his sister to prison or worse. _I'm good at keeping secrets. I won't betray them, I can't betray them. He would be so disappointed._ She thought about her father.

Clarke walked back to her station and sat on the couch in the small living room. She tucked her feet under knees and pulled a blanket over her body. Tomorrow this would be better. Tomorrow it would make sense.

* * *

Bellamy kept watch on his post with his nerves about to make him jump out of his skin. _What if she tells someone? Her family is best friends with Jaha. What if someone finds out about O?_ He thought frantically. His hand tightened on his taser. He would fight every single one of them. He would lose, he knew this, but he wouldn't let them take her to prison for the rest of her life. Clarke said she wouldn't tell anyone, but he couldn't trust her. She was The Ark's Princess. The darling of Alpha Station. The morning was dragging on, but he wouldn't get a break until lunch. And then what, try to talk to her while she was in the cafeteria. What if she didn't take lunch and worked through it? How was going her going to talk to her? Maybe if he could only explain to her.

* * *

Clarke looked up from her work on inventory to see that it was already four in the afternoon. She needed to get up and stretch her stiff muscles. Thomas Mayer and John Goode, two members of Alpha Station Guard, walked into the waiting room.

"Clarke, where's your mom at?" Thomas asked while scanning the room.

"She had to go see a critical pediatric patient at Farm Station. What can I do for you both?" Thomas came around to the other side of her desk and held up his hand. It was badly bandaged with a loose rag wrapped around it.

"We tried to help one of the mechanics who got caught up in the explosion the other night. Thomas here, tried to lift a beam that was on fire." John explained.

"Here, lets take this to the exam room. I'll bandage that a little better." Thomas sat on the exam table and looked around like a frightened kid.

"Thomas here didn't want to come in. Said he wasn't hurt that bad." John kept explaining.

"It's not that bad." Thomas argued while Clarke unwrapped his hand.

"I'll be the judge of that." Clark replied. Once she had unwrapped his hand, she took note of the charred skin. The top layer of skin had been scraped away in areas and bone was showing through on his knuckles and some of his wrist.

"Jesus Thomas!" John exclaimed. Apparently, even he hadn't realized how bad this burn was. "That's more than a little scrape!"

"No, it's not that big a deal, right Clarke?" Clarke chose not to answer as she administered a lidocaine injection to deaden the area.

"Well, I'm not going to lie, I've seen worse. But not much worse. I'll need to scrape away the dead flesh and rewrap it." She explained and continued to do just that. "Should heal up fine as long as you keep it dry and clean."

Thomas nodded and looked away as she started her job of picking out the dead skin from the healthy, "Thanks for the quick job, Clarke. We've got an inspection in less than an hour and he's going to need both hands." John said as he kept watching her like a memorized kid.

"Oh really, huh? Searching for contraband?" Clarke teased.

John missed the joke, "Nah. Just routine surprise check," He continued.

"Who's the lucky station? I only ask because, I haven't picked up my room in a while." Clarke joked.

"Ah, you're good Clarke. Factory station drew the short straw, we're looking for food caches. Apparently, rations have been disappearing." Clarke stopped breathing.

"Oh, really? Well good luck, boys." She filled out Thomas' paperwork for a work injury and handed it to him. John waved goodbye and they both. Clarke was in panic. She had to warn Bellamy. They could discover Octavia if it was truly a surprise inspection.

Clarke grabbed some bandages, stuffed them into her pockets and locked her office as she briskly walked towards Bellamy's home. She had to help them. She had to.

* * *

Bellamy rubbed the back of his neck as he shifted from one foot to the next. Something was brewing in the guard, but he hadn't figured out what it was.

"Cadet Blake, gather the rest of the team up. Surprise inspection at Factory Station in five." Bellamy' stomach dropped to his feet. If he had to help lead an inspection, he wouldn't be able to hide O. If he made a run for it, they'd surely discover. And his mother was at work, she usually chose to work from home on the days of surprise inspections. She hadn't taken off today, so she must've not known about it.

"Yes sir." He sputtered. He would have to warn Octavia minutes before they opened the door. Octavia was smart, she would figure it out. If she didn't they'd both be dead.

* * *

Clarke knocked on the door. She prayed that Bellamy was home. It was doubtful.

"Hello! Please open up. Bellamy it's me Clarke! Open up! It's an emergency, they're doing a surprise inspection." The lock turned slowly and the door opened.

Bellamy's sister stared at her from behind the door. Clarke quickly stepped in and shut the door and locked it.

"I have to hide you, they're doing a surprise inspection."

"Okay, I have a hiding space." The girl explained.

Clarke watched as the girl motioned to the floor. She knew that if the guards were looking for food, if they even noticed one corner of that trap door Bellamy's sister was a goner.

"No, that won't work this time. My name is Clarke. What's yours?" Clarke as she took out the bandages and began to wrap them around the girl's head.

"Octavia. My name is Octavia." Octavia stood still as Clark wrapped all the bandages completely around Octavia's head leaving just enough room to breathe and see out of for one eye.

"What happens if someone asks for my I.D.?" Octavia breathed fastthe anticipation of actually getting to go outside was too exciting.

"I'll handle it. Just follow me, don't speak and try not to draw attention okay?" Octavia nodded.

Clark took Octavia by the and and led her down towards the medical wing. If anyone asked what they were doing, Clarke would say Octavia was a factory station worker who she was bringing in for more burn treatment. It was lame, but no one usually argued with her when it came to medical necessities.

Octavia followed Clarke silently, but took in all the sights. She wanted to stop and look at everything, especially the views of the sky, but Clarke kept dragging her forward.

Clark looked right and left making sure the ghost was clear before veering left away from medical. When she was little, she and Wells would run around the station playing hide and seek. They found tons of hiding places. But her favorite had been one wing over from medical. Mecha Station housed all the mechanical workings for the Ark. But little did everyone know, there was a hidden bay that used to be a place where docking ships were serviced. It had been sealed up when the Ark was created, but a tiny room was created with an amazing view of the earth. It was Clarke's favorite place to hide. When she hid from Wells the first time the loud noises from the machines scared her, but when she found this secret bay it was silent. It became her sanctuary. It was also surrounded by machines, so you could make as much noise as you wanted and no one would hear.

Clarke slid a panel away from the wall and ushered Octavia inside. The room had no conventional lights, but due to the large docking window, it was lit by starlight. Clark had also hidden rations and a lantern here for when she visited. She took the bag of trail mix she always keep on hand and handed the bag to Octavia to munch on.

"Thanks, that's so nice of you. This is amazing." Octavia beamed at the view while grazing on the food. She sat happily and quietly as Clarke breathed a sigh of relief. No one would find them here.

* * *

Bellamy's heart was about to burst out of his chest. He knocked three times with no answer. And knocked again, "Come on Blake, we have to check the other rooms too before we move to the next hallway." His partner Terrance stated.

Shumway pushed past both of them and used his master key to open Bellamy's door. He swung it open.

Bellamy held his breath, but sighed in quiet relief when he saw the room was empty.

"Clear. Move on." Shumway announced as Bellamy closed the door.

 _Good job, O._ Bellamy thought.

Clarke looked at her watch. It was after eight at night. She had sat here with Octavia for over four hours. The search had to be over by now. Her mom was bound to be livid since she hadn't left a note or returned to the office.

"Okay Octavia. Let's head back." Clarke stated and stood up. Octavia had stared outside the entire time they had been holed up.

"Sure." She said sadly and got to her feet.

Clarke felt for the girl, she had never been able to set foot outside her family's home and now that she had seen the outside, Clarke was forcing her to go back. It wasn't Clarke's fault that Octavia had to go back, but she still felt guilty.

Octavia met Clarke's eyes. Even through the bandages Clarke felt her gaze bore through her, "Why did you save me?" She asked sheepishly.

Clarke couldn't lie to her, "I don't know. I guess, I didn't want to see you or Bellamy get hurt." Octavia nodded sadly, "I don't know if we'll ever come back here together. But I can come visit you. Would that be okay?" Clarke asked.

She had few friends. She could count them on one hand. And Octavia had even less than that. Just Bellamy. But she was so sweet, she deserved a friend and Clarke wanted to have a friend she trusted completely. She used to have that in Wells, but ever since Jaha had floated her father, things were different between her and Wells.

"Let's go. Bellamy must be losing his mind." Clarke murmured and Octavia smiled. Clarke kept her close on the walk back and smiled. Even though the afternoon was tense, she enjoyed hanging out with Octavia. Octavia didn't want anything from her. She didn't need medical help, she didn't want anything from the Princess of the Ark, she didn't care about social status or station status. No strings, just friendship. She didn't know she had missed that until she had it again. _I'll protect her, she deserves that if only for being my friend._

* * *

Bellamy frantically paced the expanse of the small room. His mother hadn't returned home from work yet, but O was missing. She wasn't in her hiding place. Where had she gone? Why had she gone outside during a surprise inspection? Had someone spotted her? Turned her in? Was that why his mom wasn't home yet? Had they already convicted her and decided floating her was easier than a trial?

"I just like the flavor of blueberries best. I don't know why." Clark said as Octavia opened the door.

Bellamy stood with his hands in his pocket, "What is going on? O? Are you okay?" Bellamy reached for the bandages.

"I'm fine Bells. Clarke used the bandages as a disguise. Bell we walked right in front of people and no one even stopped us. It was so cool!" Octavia squealed and hugged Bellamy. Bellamy looked as confused as he felt.

"Let me take these off you Octavia." Bellamy stood perplexed as Clark unwrapped his sister's face. Octavia sighed happily and pulled a bag of food out from her skirted pants.

"Where did you get that?" He asked incredulously.

"Relax, Bellamy. I gave it to her." Clarke motioned for him to be quiet as Octavia skipped to her desk and began to sketch.

"What is going on?" He asked.

"I heard about the inspection and didn't want her to get caught. They told me they were specifically looking for food stores. I got worried." Bellamy ran his hands down his face. "Sorry if we worried you, I-" Bellamy pulled Clarke into his embrace. His arm encircled her shoulders and he lowered his head onto hers.

"Thank you. Thank you so much." Clark was still for a moment. She wasn't sure what to do. Then the urge to hug him back was too much and she wrapped her arms around his waist and tucked her head into his shoulder.

"She's fine. You need to be resting." Clarke mumbled against his chest. Bellamy laughed and released her.

"My mom will be home soon. She doesn't know about this." Bellamy explained.

Clarke nodded in agreement, " I need to get going. My mom is gonna freak when she realizes I never came back to the office and did inventory. But it's okay, I'll figure it out." Clarke smiled and patted Bellamy's shoulder affectionately.

Bellamy smiled. Clarke had protected his sister. Against the entire Ark, she had risked her own life and hid Octavia and on top of it, Octavia looked blissful.

"Bye Octavia. I'll see you soon." Octavia jumped out of her chair and hugged Clarke.

"Thank you so much! I'm so happy to have you as a friend. By the way, everyone calls you princess, or at least Bellamy does. Do I need to call you Princess too?" Octavia asked in complete deadpan.

Bellamy rubbed the back of his neck nervously. Clarke rolled her eyes, "Of course not. I don't know who started that stupid nickname. Clarke is fine." Octavia nodded and hugged her once more before Clarke slipped through the door and headed back.

* * *

Bellamy watched his sister as she hummed while continuing to doodle on a sketch pad that Clarke had brought her. He still couldn't believe how happy she was. She was a different person, no longer the ghost of the little girl who used to beg for pony rides.

"I gotta go, my shift's about to start." Bellamy said and Octavia waved bye without looking up from her sketch. He smiled and pulled on his jacket.

Their mother was none the wiser about Clarke's knowledge of Octavia. Clarke timed her visits to usually either late night or afternoons. She had been so good at avoiding his mother, he wondered if it was on purpose. Probably not, but he would mention it to her. The strange thing was, that Octavia wasn't the only one who had made a friend. Clarke stopped by and talked to him as much as she did Octavia. She always checked on his injuries and admonished him when she noticed he'd overdone it. They were friends when she visited them at his home, but when they were out in the real world, they both kept their distance. It shouldn't have upset him, but it did. Clarke had become a anchor for him, and he couldn't even smile hello without someone becoming suspicious. Everyone's eyes followed her into a room and he found his eyes being drawn to her now too.

He had cafeteria duty today. It was considered one of the easier duties to shovel. Just watch the crowds during the main lunch hours and keep the peace. Most of the time the crowds were docile. He caught sight of loose blond curls pulled into a bun at the nape of a neck. He moved to right slightly to improve his field of vision. It was Clarke.

She was in line to grab something to eat. She was tailed by two members of Farm Station. He thought their names were Kelsey and Janice. They were talking and laughing about something Janice said. She talked to everyone in the room with such ease. She stopped by an empty table and sat down. The two girls trailed behind her and sat across from her once they reached the table.

Every person that went by the table said hello to her. She pulled the room to her without even trying. She sat in the light and he blended into the shadows. They couldn't be more opposite, but he was the same as the rest of the people around her. Drawn to her kindness.

Bellamy shook his head slightly. _Stop it! You can't think like this, not about_ _ **her**_ _. She's O's only friend. Do not fuck this up._

She waved to someone at a nearby table and got up to leave. He watched her move across the room through the crowd. He breathed a sigh of relief when she left. Now he could concentrate. Now he could do his job.

* * *

"Okay, Chancellor Jaha is throwing his son's usual birthday celebration tomorrow night. He has requested extra security. So on top of guards we've assigned a small team of cadets to mingle with the kids. If you hear your name, step forward," Shumway read from the list, "Lavila, Stockton, Knowles, Seldon, Lynch, Arnold, O'Donnel and Blake." Bellamy stepped forward along with others.

"You've all been chosen for this detail. Be at the party at Alpha station at 2000 hours. Be on time and in uniform. You are not to dance, speak with anyone or eat anything. You are there to guard Jaha's guests. That is your only job. Dismissed." Everyone left and headed home. Bellamy smiled. He would get to see Clarke.

* * *

Clarke sighed. She hated parties. She hated getting all prettied up and everyone always wanted to talk to her about this, about that. She just wanted to eat cake and be left alone. She had better things to do than preen for the masses. She looked at the horrendous thing her mother called a dress. She preferred a pair of jeans and tennis shoes with a loose t-shirt. This thing was made of lace and silky material that fell to her feet in gentle waves. The top half split down the middle enveloping her in ornate lace designs that swirled around her arms and ending with the black looping around her fingers. Her hair was piled atop her head in a mess of curls that fell about her face, "framing it" as her mother had said. The shoes were the only saving grace. Thankfully, her mother had listened to her when she said heels were not her friend. They were a roman style of flat shoe that laced up her legs all the way to her knee. When she moved the dress split and showed off her calves. It made her feel exposed, but her mother said she never looked better.

The party was in full swing by the time Clarke arrived. She didn't enjoy all the glances and attention her outfit was getting as she made her way towards Wells. She smirked. Well's dad had obviously forced him to dress up.

"Hey Birthday Boy, looking sharp." Clarke joked and Wells rolled his eyes.

"You have no idea how uncomfortable this is." Wells grumbled while trying to the collar of his formal tuxedo.

"Try squeezing into one of these getups while holding your breath and not eating for the past three hours. Then talk to me." She teased and kissed his cheek. "Seriously though, congrats." Wells nodded and half hugged Clarke. It was one of those masculine hugs that was more pat on the back than an actual hug.

Clarke made her way over to the refreshments and cut a piece of cake. Damn it all, if she had to wear this get up, she was getting a piece of cake out of it. Chocolate, her favorite. The Chancellor hadn't spared any expense it seemed. Clarke licked stray frosting off her fingers and caught a glimpse of someone across the way. Standing against one of the doorways into the gathering room was Bellamy.

His posture was relaxed, like he could be any partygoer, but his eyes were focused on the crowd. Constantly scanning, never forgetting to watch. Clarke made her way over to him. But as she started to walk towards him, his gaze lingered over her a little longer than the rest of the crowd.

Bellamy couldn't help it. Clarke in a dress was mesmerizing. He had trouble tearing his eyes away from the way he sashayed her hips as she took each step. She was beautiful, but it was an alien beauty. She looked like some kind of barbarian princess, not the sweet Clarke with unruly wavy blonde hair and ice blue eyes. The black smudges around her eyes made her eyes look dark and menacing, rather than the bright orbs he knew them to be. She came to stand in front of him, glancing at him out of the corner of her eye as she too scanned the crowd.

He didn't meet her eyes, but kept scanning the crowd, "Are you allowed to speak?" She asked with a smile in her eyes.

"Not really, Princess." She rolled her eyes dismissively. She hated the title, but he had taken to using it instead of her name.

"How's Octavia?" She asked.

Bellamy shrugged, "As good as can be expected." Clarke nodded.

Shumway was making his rounds through the crowd. Bellamy spotted him first, then Clarke followed his gaze.

"Is he bothering you, Clarke?" Shumway asked throwing a dismissive glance at Bellamy.

"Hardly. I just asked if they could have cake. Seems almost a torture for all the guards to have to work during a party, and not even get a taste of cake." Clarke teased, faking social courtesy with the best of them.

"The guards can have the leftover refreshments, the cadets are restricted. It's a privilege only bestowed to us." Shumway offered his arm to Clarke in the way a gentleman might've offered to escort a lady in 1900 England. Clarke threw up a little in her mouth, but covered it up with a giggle and took his arm playing the part of the princess to perfection.

Bellamy stood at his post and watched the party continue on. In truth, he was starving. He had given his last ration to Octavia before showing up for duty. Having to see all these privileged Alpha station stuff themselves silly while dancing was making him ill. Clarke hadn't touched any of the food since she spoke to him. Strangely, even though Clarke was from Alpha station, he didn't see her as one of them. She was just Clarke Griffin, who saved his sister, whose kindness knew no limits.

Clarke winked at him and scooted two pieces of chocolate cake and some others goodies into a box that she procured from one of the people setting up the food. Before Bellamy could smile the wall behind her blew out. Debris, smoke and fire bellowing out from the entire left side of the room.

The explosion had knocked him to the ground. The ringing pounded in his ears as he tried to sit up. He heard groaning around him. Everyone was on the floor. Bellamy forced his body to roll to a sitting position.

 _Clarke!_ His thoughts raced by. Would he find her dead, among a pile of bodies? Whatever that explosion had been, Clarke had been at the center it. He made his way to where the food tables were before the explosion. The room was thick with smoke and it crawled down his throat and made breathing so hard.

"CLARKE!" Bellamy shouted over the roaring of the fire and the cracking of plaster. The fire was still going as people ran out of the room to get to safety. The fire kept climbing the walls. If he didn't find her soon, they both might not make it out of here alive.

"CLARKE! CAN YOU HEAR ME!?" He heard a groan and saw one pale bleeding ankle under two dead bodies. "Clarke!?" Bellamy rolled the bodies off her and took in her injuries. "Clarke, are you alright? Can you hear me? Answer me!" Bellamy's voice cracked on the last syllable. He touched two fingers to her neck and she groaned. Bellamy didn't wait for anything else. She was alive, that was all that mattered. Not caring about anyone else, he swung her over his shoulder in a fireman's carry and hurried out of the blaze as quickly as possible. The partygoers were rushing about trying to find loved ones in the hallways. Bellamy pushed past them.

Clarke groaned atop Bellamy's shoulder, "It's okay Clarke. You're going to be okay, you hear me?"

No response. Bellamy broke into a run heading towards the medical wing. When he got there it was crowded with people with cuts and bruises. Mostly non-lethal stuff.

"HELP! I NEED HELP!" Bellamy bellowed as he carefully swung Clarke into his arms and carried her into the medical suite.

"Make a hole! Move it people!" Abby Griffin parted the sea of people to see Bellamy carrying her unconscious daughter. Abby took one look at her daughter's face and motioned for him to put her on the table.

"What happened?" Abby asked as she started an IV.

"I don't know. Some kind of explosion at the party. Clarke was at the center of it. I found her under two dead people." Abby nodded and took her daughters blood pressure. She was concentrating on reading Clarke's vital signs as Bellamy looked on helplessly.

"Is she going to be okay?" He asked breathlessly, panting by Clarke's side.

"Something's going on. Her blood pressure is too low. She's losing blood, but I don't know where. She's breathing okay, no distended abdominals, it's doesn't seem to be internal." Abby rattling off explanation after explanation.

"She had blood on her leg." Bellamy coughed out as he tried to clear his lungs from the ash and toxic smoke. Abby searched her daughter's legs and found a huge splinter of wood stuck high into her thigh.

"Good catch. It nicked her femoral artery." Abby explained. "Put pressure here." Abby instructed placing Bellamy's hand atop the splinter. The blood kept covering his hands in red gushes. He kept pressing harder trying to make it stop.

 _Not her. Not her. Please not her._ He kept chanting in his mind while trying to keep that precious fluid inside her. Abby took a clamp and inserted it in-between is where his fingers slipped on Clarke's skin from the blood pulsing between them. The blood stopped pulsing.

Bellamy removed his hands and let Abby do her work. Bellamy collapsed into a chair by the side of the operating table. He looked at his hands and felt like falling apart. _I should've stayed next to her, I should've stopped it. I should've saved her. Not her, please not her._ Bellamy wasn't much for praying, God seemed to have a cruel sense of humor when it came to his life, but he hung his head low and sent one lonely plea up to God. Begged him to spare Clarke. If he spared Clarke, he would do better. Be better.

"Bellamy?" Abby asked in front of him. Bellamy hadn't noticed, but she had been calling his name, hadn't she? Abby sat on her haunches in front of Bellamy.

"Huh? Is she okay?" He asked dazed as his gaze floating towards Clarke. She was still so pale, her skin an ashen gray, not the usually healthy pink.

"She's doing good. You saved her, now I'm worried about you. How many fingers am I holding up?" Abby held up four.

"I'm fine. Don't worry about me." Bellamy stood up and then had to sit back down. A wave of dizziness hit him like a battering ram.

"You're not okay. I'm pretty sure you've got a concussion. Sit here, I'll come check on you in a little while, okay?" He nodded and Abby went to tend to other patients.

Clarke may have been okay, but her hand hung limply off the table. The way she looked disturbed him. Like she was a lifeless corpse. But then he saw her chest move up and down, up and down. He counted each breath she took. He reached over and took her hand in his own. It was so tiny compared to his. She seemed larger than life when she was around him, but she wasn't. She was so fragile, so easily breakable.

He squeezed her hand and felt the tears start to flow. He thought he was going to lose her. His only friend. Octavia's only friend.

"Bell-amy."She asked as she started to come around.

Bellamy scrubbed at his eyes with the back of his hands. He smeared her blood along the side of his face by accident, not caring, "Clarke? You're okay. You're in medical." He explained.

Clarke opened her eyes, at first the light was so bright then a shadow covered the light. Bellamy's face above her, looking down at her with concern. His onyx eyes searched hers. He looked as if he was memorizing every angle, every scar, every curve.

"What happened?" Clarke asked trying to sit up. Bellamy's hand on her shoulder stopped the movement in its tracks.

"There was some kind of explosion at the party. Don't try to move. You almost died." His voice was rough, like he'd swallowed glass. He coughed after finishing his sentence.

"Are you okay?" She asked with concern seeing the blood on his hands and his face. The hand he had been holding reached up to wipe at the blood on his face.

She cupped his face gently in that hand. It took all her strength to lift it up to his face. Bellamy's usual expression fell away and Clarke saw he was terrified. Terrified of losing her. Terrified of finding her. His face was a mask of vulnerability. He placed his hand over hers on his face, "I'm fine. Little concussion, no big deal." He whispered against her hand.

"Help me up." She ordered.

"You need to rest." He growled, becoming angry.

"There are more emergent cases coming in. They'll need the operating table." She argued again and tried to sit up.

"You are so stubborn." He said as tugged her arm over his shoulders and they limped to her office. He helped her to lied down on the couch without pulling out the IV that was currently replacing her blood. Bellamy sat in her chair and swiveled around.

"You can't go to sleep for at least eight hours if you've really got a concussion." Clarke warned as she glanced at him. Her finger pointing at him accusingly.

"Wouldn't dream of it, Princess." He smirked and swiveled in the fancy chair again.

"Good, I'd hate for you to die." She mumbled and passed out again.

"Get some rest, Clarke." He said. Atop the couch was a blanket. He took it and gently placed it over her.

Abby came back into the operating room to find Bellamy in the doorway of Clarke's office, "She wouldn't stay on the table?"

Bellamy shook his head, "She said you would need it for other patients."

Abby shook her head, "Of course she did." She turned to look at the cadet who had saved her only daughter, "Thank you for saving her."

Bellamy nodded silently and turned back to Clarke.

"Go home. Get some rest, just don't sleep for at least eight hours." Abby pointed at him.

"Like mother, like daughter." He chuckled and headed to Octavia.

* * *

Clarke woke to her mother snoring in spurts in her office chair. Clark looked at the clock on the wall. Ten in the morning. She got a little sleep.

She shrugged out of the blanket and sat up. Disconnecting the IV she walked over to her mother and covered her with the blanket. Stretching she stood up. She looked down at her leg. She was going to have a nice big scar on her inner thigh. Clarke scanned the new logs. Apparently, a heating mechanical failure had caused flammable gas to build up in the heating ducts and when someone turned on the lights at the party a spark ignited it. The most devastating news was that their stores of medical supplies had been decimated. Some of those medicines took years to culture, especially the antibiotics.

Clarke sighed. This was bad for everyone. Clarke reached into the pocket and smiled as she pulled out a handful of blueberries. She had swiped them for Octavia. She had also planned to take both her and Bellamy chocolate cake. Chocolate cake that was now gone. She didn't know why, but that thought is what broke her. Not the thought of dying, not the thought of the victims, but that Octavia and Bellamy wouldn't get chocolate cake like she had planned.

"Damnit, pull it together Clarke." She sniffled and wiped her nose on the sleeve of the dress. _Silver lining._ Clark thought and ripped a sleeve off and used it as a tissue. She took the few precious blueberries and put them in a baggie. It wasn't much, but it was something.

* * *

So, that's my chapter two. How did you guys like it? Please review.


	3. Chapter 3

Bellamy pulled on his coat. The aftermath of the explosion was already becoming old news. Two days later and everyone was getting on with their lives. He hadn't seen Clarke since that night. He was constantly thinking about her. She hadn't looked good when he left, but she had been bossy, so that was something.

When he cracked the door to slip through, Clarke was on the other side raising her hand to knock, "Clarke." Bellamy said surprised.

"Clarke!?" Octavia squeaked from the interior of the room. Bellamy swung the door open and Clarke hurried in. She didn't get far before Octavia pummeled her with a hug.

"Missed you too Octavia." She wheeze out from Octavia's bear hug.

"I was so worried. Bells told me about how you almost died. Clarke, you can't die, okay?" Clarke nodded and slowly loosened her friend's vice like grip.

"O, she has to breathe to be alive." Bellamy chuckled as Octavia immediately released her and Clarke sputtered a little.

"Here, I brought treats." Clarke held up a bowl of fruit. A couple of honey dew melon slices, cantaloupe, orange slices and apples and a few blueberries.

"How did-" Bellamy started.

"YUM!" Octavia screeched at the same time Bellamy sputtered. Octavia took a piece of honey dew melon and handed it to Bells first. He bit into it and smiled.

"We never get fresh fruit." She explained and munched on a blueberry. "I see what you mean, these are really good."

Clark held out a protein bar to Bellamy, "Go on. Get to work. Octavia and I are going to watch movies and pass out. Doctor's orders. I'm off today and tomorrow." Bellamy smiled and took the protein bar. He hadn't eaten for two days. He had been giving his rations to Octavia.

Clarke picked out a movie on the screen and she and Octavia curled up under a blanket and watched it. Even though Octavia had seen it probably a thousand times, she still enjoyed watching it with a friend.

Clarke enjoyed the peace and quiet. Her home was never quiet. It was always full of visitors. Clarke looked at her hand. It hadn't trembled since that fateful night she had bumped into Bellamy in the hallway. Maybe she was cured.

* * *

Bellamy let out a deep breath as he opened the front door to see Clarke asleep on the couch. His little sister was curled up in the chair opposite the couch. His mother had met him at lunch at told him she wouldn't be home tonight.

Clarke looked like herself. Jeans, t-shirt and her hair a mess of blond waves around her face. She looked so much better than she had. He looked around to try to figure out where to sit. He could sit on the ground by the couch and rest his back, but the floor was cold. He kept trying to decide when Clarke shifted in her sleep and pulled her legs to her chest a little. Problem solved. Bellamy lifted Clarke's feet and sat at the end of the couch. He brushed the hair away from her face. Her cheeks were flushed with sleep and he smiled.

Bellamy leaned his head back and tried to get some sleep too. He'd been so exhausted lately.

Bellamy started when he heard a sound like a whimper. He jerked his neck and cursed. He had fallen asleep on the couch and now his neck was making him pay for it. He looked down at the other end of the couch. Clarke murmured in her sleep. Her feet kicked out and she whimpered, which caused Bellamy to grunt as her kick landed solidly into his stomach. Bellamy didn't know what to do, should he wake her up? Should he leave her alone?

Gently he touched her face, "Clarke?" He asked gently, "Clarke, you're okay." He said quietly.

"No! Don't, no don't!" Her voice broke on the last syllable. Bellamy's breath hitched. She sounded so broken, not like the strong young woman he knew. He had forgotten how young she truly was, and that she might have demons of her own. If he was being honest, he didn't know many personal details about her life. Only what he had heard as rumors. Her father dying was the only fact he actually had. What was she dreaming about?

"Clarke, wake up. You're okay." He whispered and touched her side and shook gently.

Clarke started to cry in her sleep and Bellamy shook her harder. He couldn't bear to watch her weep like that. Such crushing sobs. Clarke's eyes shot open and she jerked upright.

"Wha-" She looked around and her eyes settled on Octavia. "I fell asleep." She mumbled to herself.

"You were having a nightmare." Bellamy spoke from the end of the couch. Clarke's eyes shot to him. She hand't known he was there. She pulled her legs off him and swung them around to touch the floor.

"Yeah. Bad one." She murmured.

"Wanna talk about it?" He asked.

She shook her head, "I have to get back home. My mom is already suspicious of where I go for hours."

"You're lucky. Mine barely notices whether I'm here or not." Bellamy began to fold up the blanket.

Clarke got up and cracked her back. Bellamy cracked his neck and felt the bone pop into place, "Hey, I need to look at those taser cuts." Clarke motioned to his chest.

"They're fine." Bellamy assured her.

Clarke just stood there not moving an inch. Bellamy sighed and stood. He lifted up his shirt for her to inspect. She touched each one, but when she got to the last one, he flinched.

"I don't like the way that one is looking. It might be infected. Come by the office tomorrow after your shift and I'll take a look at it."

"You're not supposed to be working." Bellamy grumbled.

"I'm not, call it a favor for a friend." Bellamy growled something inarticulate and she smiled.

"See ya tomorrow." She teased.

"Tomorrow." Bellamy shot back and closed the door behind her.

* * *

Clarke waited for her one and only patient of the day. Bellamy sauntered in around three in the afternoon. She got up and opened the exam room up to him. Sitting roughly on the exam table cushion, he waited for her to start whatever she was going to do. Clarke didn't like the color of his skin. He looked paler than he had before. She stuck a thermometer in his mouth. When it beeped it read 103.5.

"Shit, you'r sick." Clarke said without meaning to. "Sorry about the bedside manner." She apologized and he smiled.

"It's alright. I'm not a patient. Friend, remember?" He reminded her. She nodded and pulled out her stethoscope.

She breathed on it, but he still flinched when she placed the cold metal on his chest. His heart was thrumming so fast she could barely count the beast. Not good, "Alright, your definitely in the red here. Lift up that shirt. I gotta get a good look at this bad boy."

Bellamy did as instructed and shivered at the cold air of the room, "Sorry, the cold temps keep down the bacteria." She explained and removed the bandage from the infected wound.

Clarke had to fight to keep the stoic look on her face. This wound was the closet to his heart, and already three red streaks weeding out from the wound, "Lay down." She barked, she was done with any teasing. Bellamy didn't even fight her bossiness and did as he was told.

"How long has that wound looked like that?" She asked him.

Bellamy shrugged, "Couple of days."

"Jesus. You're almost septic and you just shrug." She growled. She used her I.D. Card to unlock the medicine cabinet. She went over to Bellamy and dug out his medical ration card from his back pocket. He didn't even fight her when she took it out. She scanned the card against the inner lock to unlock proportioned medicine and the cabinet didn't unlock.

She tried again, but the same thing happened, "What?" She asked aloud. She looked down at the scanner. It read "insufficient ration".

"No, no, no, no," Clarke kept saying that as her head rested against the door. Bellamy was factory station. Each station member got a certain amount of medical and food ration. With corresponding jobs of importance you got more ration for both. Bellamy was only a cadet from Factory Station. His ration card wouldn't allow him to get enough of the antibiotic to combat the sepsis.

"Screw it." Clarke said and pulled out her medical ration card.

Bellamy reached up and caught her wrist before she scanned it, "No, don't."

Clarke looked at him, "Bellamy, you need this. If you don't get this, you could die. You're already halfway there. If the infection reaches your heart, you're a goner. I can't let happen." She whispered the last sentence.

"Too risky. You could get sent to Sky Box. Not worth it." His voice trailed off as the fever took him under and he passed out.

Once he was completely out, Clarke looked back at the medicine and said more to herself than anyone else "I need you to be okay." Then she swiped card. The light blinked green and the case unlocked. She gently put in an IV and hung the drugs.

She wiped the sweaty hair away from his face, "You saved me, I save you. That's what we do." She whispered against his ear.

* * *

Bellamy felt something cool on his forehead. He cracked one eye open and looked around. The last thing he remembered is laying down on the exam table. He lifted his hand to his forehead. Someone had placed a cool rag there. When he tried to shift his head, his neck screamed in protest. He turned it slightly to the right and saw Clarke slumped in a chair that she had pulled next to the exam table. Bellamy looked at the clock on the wall that blinked military time in neon green. It was 0400. Which meant he had been asleep for more than twelve hours. Clarke had stayed and watched over him for more than half a day.

He shouldn't have been surprised. She always took care of people, whether they deserved it or not. But he was still shocked that she had stayed with him. Watching over him. Caring for him.

His gaze kept falling on her. The way her head was tucked into her shoulder and her knees pulled up close to her chest. Someone had covered her with a loose blanket. Probably her mother when she left for the day to go home, but Clarke hadn't gone home. She hadn't left his side to even go get a shower in. He looked up at the bag of antibiotics that was nearly dry that was now in his system. He sighed. She used her medical ration to give those to him. With the explosion taking out so much medical supplies those antibiotics would be precious. Someone who needs those drugs later might not make it because of him.

"You're up." Clarke murmured as she uncurled from her chair and shook the blanket off. She also shook off the last vestiges of sleep and stretched lightly to help her muscles unwind. She placed her hand lightly on his forehead and nodded in approval, "Your fever is broken. How do you feel?"

"Better." Bellamy grunted and sat up with a little help from Clarke.

"Good. That's good." Clarke said and took his blood pressure and pulse just to make sure, while sticking a thermometer in her mouth. He tried to mumble around the thing, but Clarke held up a finger and he waited until the beeping came to pull the thing out of his mouth.

"Clarke," She looked up from her watch counting his heartbeats and met his eyes, "You shouldn't have-."

Clarke covered his lips with her hand and smiled, "Lets not do this right now. You'll tell me I was stupid. I'll say you don't get to tell me how to treat my patients and then we'll end up growling other insults back and forth. You'll call me a spoiled princess and I'll call you a dickhead. Let's just not. It was a long night and right now I'm just grateful you're alright."

Bellamy sighed underneath her hand and looked at the floor. He ignored her plea, "Clarke, what you did could get you floated. Misuse of I.D. is punishable by floating or life in the skybox."

"We self-monitor the meds ourselves. Our logs are never checked and I doubt this early in the crisis anyone is going to make any fuss. People who were injured from the explosion have already been treated. If we can just avoid another disaster and a few injuries we should be okay until Farm Station can resupply with herbs and the raw materials to make new drugs."

Bellamy sighed again and gingerly hoped down from the table. His legs were a little wobbly, but other than that he felt much better. Clark lifted up his shirt without permission and touched the troublesome wound with gloved fingertips.

Bellamy winced, but didn't cry out as her nimble fingers probed the wound and cleaned it. She must've performed a debridement procedure while he was out. The wound looked less puffy and felt less painful, but still tender. Bellamy froze as her other gently brushed his lower stomach. Her hands left a trail of heat over his body. He should've been more concerned with the pain, but for some reason that non-medical brush on his hip bone set his body on fire more than any pain could have

Clarke misinterpreted his stillness for pain, "Sorry. Almost done." She redressed the wound, "It looks good. Keep it clean, I'll check in on you tomorrow. Take it easy. Doctor's orders." She said sternly.

"Yes mam." He chirped and smirked as he opened the office door and left. He took deep breaths as he closed the door behind him. _You have got to a get a grip. It's just Clarke._ He told himself.

* * *

Two weeks went by without so much as a peep. Clarke's mother was keeping her on a tight leash. Making sure her apprenticeship continued like it was supposed to. She barely let Clarke have any time off. There was no shortage of cases, with the explosion victim follow up appointments and normal day to day work, Clarke barely saw her own bed most nights. This was the first night that Abby had let her clock out at a decent hours.

Clarke thumbed through the latest medical textbook her mother had gifted to her. She had already read it a thousand times before, but now it was officially hers. Abby Griffin thought that the only gift worth giving was knowledge, she treasured her books and Clarke knew what it took to give up this one. Clarke fingered the worn pages and traced her mother's notes with her fingers. The imprints from from the notes she had written with were like engravings. Even if they never really spoke again like they used to, she would always have this piece of her mother.

"I saw Wells today. He told me to tell you hello." Her mother said as she stirred her latest medical concoction on the stove.

"How's his leg doing?" Clarke responded not really caring about the answer. She knew how Well's leg was doing. She had been the one to set it after the party explosion. A broken femur is a bitch, but there isn't much to be done other than immobilize and watch for fat embolisms. They were rare, but usually fatal. They were also sudden with their symptoms, so they had to watch out especially with the largest bone in the body being broken.

"He's recovering nicely. Why don't you go see him anymore?" Abby asked. Clarke sighed frustrated with her mother. She knew why Clarke chose not to hang out with Wells as much as she used to. Every time she looked at Wells she saw Thelonius. And any time Thelonius's face popped into her head all she sees is him pushing the button that killed her father. It was weird, her mom had been brining Wells up in random conversation all night.

Clarke chose not to answer and instead grabbed her dinner, an apple, and stuffed it into her pocket. She also grabbed a bag of peanuts and some protein powder packets. They were expensive, but the best tasting ones. She always tried to grab some when she saw them in the cafeteria.

"I'm heading out. Probably won't be back until later." Clarke waved bye to her mother and pulled on her jacket. She as worried about Octavia and Bellamy. The food shortage had only gotten worse. There were stories going around that people were not only stealing food from others' stashes, but some people had begun to try catch people on their way home and essentially mug them. A knife to the throat or dinner for your family. It was a hard call.

She and her mother had plenty, being on Alpha station meant they didn't feel the pinch of the shortage as bad, but Bellamy on Factory station probably hadn't had that much of a ration to begin with and she was betting Octavia was getting most of his.

 _He's going to ruin all that hard work I put into keeping him alive._ She grumbled inside her head. Making her way to Mecha station she kept her head down and ducked behind the warped panel to sneak into her favorite hiding place. She had been storing food there forever. She never knew where the impulse came from, but anything that could last she kept here.

Digging into a container behind a large metal bin, she pulled out multiple protein bars, some dehydrated fruit and vegetables and some seeds that she had stored there. Sunflower seeds were her favorite and she hoarded them like a squirrel. But they were also high in fat and would be good for Bellamy and Octavia.

Stuffing her pockets even more she packed away the rest and headed to Factory station. Bellamy was probably still on shift, but she could hang out with Octavia until he returned.

She knocked quietly on the door. No on answered, "Octavia, it's me, Clarke." She whispered, but still no one answered. That worried her, but maybe Octavia was asleep.

Clarke shrugged and continued to walk along the hallways. She didn't want to go home, but she had no where to be. The only other place to find a little peace was medical wing, but she didn't relish going back to work so soon.

Passing by a corridor she caught movement out of the corner of her eye. It was the training center for the cadets. The inside as built like a gym with weights, machines and a large mat covered section. The wall was made of windows so that everyone could see anything going on inside the room. She caught sight of a familiar set of black curls. Bellamy was bouncing from one foot to the next as he dodged a set of expertly executed punches from another cadet.

Clarke stood memorized as she watched the deadly dance. He would fake to the left and let the punch barely graze him and then bring his fist into the other cadet's gut. The cadet he was sparring with stepped back on his right leg preparing for a round house kick, but Bellamy blocked it by grabbing the leg heading for his face and using the momentum from the kick to throw the cadet across the floor.

It was a powerful show of force, she didn't know the cadets were taught such dangerous hand-to-hand combat. But Bellamy burst out laughing as the Cadet made some under his breath remark. Bellamy offered his hand and the other Cadet took it. Bellamy helped him to stand. They said a few things to each other and then the other Cadet headed towards the locker rooms.

Bellamy stayed in the training room and made his way over to the free weight section. He reached up and looped both hands around a set up that was used for pull-ups. As he did the reps, he tucked his crossed his ankles behind him. Clarke felt like a creep watching him, but she couldn't tear her eyes away from his movements.

Whereas other Cadets seemed made of bulk, all bulging muscles, Bellamy was made of strong sinew that wrapped around his lithe body. Ropes of corded steel formed his physique. He was strength, but also speed. It was how he had dodged that other Cadet's attacks. He was built like a cat, graceful and quick on his toes. She watched as the muscles in his back shifted with each rhythmic movement. He had moved on to the bench press when she realized she had been ogling him.

A flush started to creep up her neck and into her face. She had to stop this, it was Bellamy.

Bellamy breathed out with each upward push and kept his timing quick as he did the presses. Once finished, he sat up and used the towel at his feet to wipe the sweat out of his eyes. Looking across the training room to the wall of windows he saw blue eyes meet his.

 _Clarke?_ He thought. He must've said it aloud because Tim was coming out and looked in the direction he was, "Hey, what's the princess doing in this part of the station? Isn't it past her bedtime?" Tim joked.

"Beats me," Bellamy played along as Tim walked out. Tim mock bowed to towards Clarke. Bellamy could tell that it bothered her, but that was one of the things he enjoyed about Tim. Tim was an orphan and he didn't give a shit about anyone or anything. He would say what he wanted. It was more than likely going to get him floated one day, but it was a relief not to have to pretend to be someone.

Bellamy walked over to where Clarke was now standing by the open doorway, "Is everything okay?" He asked concern lacing his voice.

"Yes, perfectly fine." She said much too quickly. Bellamy smiled at her shyness. She had seen him shirtless before. It wasn't anything new, but now they were out of her element. This was his haven, not hers.

Clarke took in Bellamy's shirtless chest. At first she took a little too long staring at it, but then she noticed he seemed a little paler than usual and maybe even a little thinner. She had been right, he was suffering from the shortage.

Clarke emptied her pockets and pressed the goodies into his hands and looked at his surprised face, "I know you and Octavia must be starving. You are probably giving your rations to her. I just don't want you to die. I worked hard to keep you breathing." She finished quickly and turned to leave.

"Hey, Clark wait!" Bellamy grabbed her by the upper arm when she was about to leave the room.

"What about you? You've got your mom and your own ration card. It can't be that much. Are you going to be okay?" He asked.

"Of course. Those are from my secret stash. Been saving them up for months. They would just go to waste, I haven't been able to visit-….well never mind. Just enjoy, okay?" She turned and left the room.

Bellamy felt bewildered and grateful. He hadn't had more water all week. She knew him too well. He had been giving his rations to Octavia, who was hungry all the time.

* * *

Bellamy slipped inside and caught sight of Octavia sketching on a new sketch pad.

"Where'd you get that?" He asked emptying his pockets onto the kitchen counter.

"Clarke dropped it by a couple of days ago. She wasn't able to stay, but wanted to make sure I had plenty of paper. She's always thinking about everybody else, huh?" Bellamy had been nodding away the conversation, but when she said that his eyes snapped up.

"What does that sound sad the way you said it?" He asked sitting across from his sister at the table.

"I don't know. I mean, her entire job is about taking care of people. She takes care of me and is my friend. She's your friend, but who takes care of her?" Octavia shrugged and continued to sketch.

"Night, O." He whispered as he kissed the top of her head. She kept drawing and patted his hand lightly as a goodnight.

Octavia may have been able to dismiss the thought about Clarke, but he couldn't. _Who takes care of you, Clarke?_ His thoughts travelled back to the night she had saved him by using her own medical ration. Even with her being Alpha Station, that one use was probably her entire medical ration for a year. Even if she had a headache now she couldn't even get a painkiller.

She had been selfless not to mention brave about the possible consequences. If anyone ever found she abused her power as a doctor and used her I.D. for him she could be floated.

Bellamy sat on the edge of his bed and flopped backwards staring up at the ceiling. _Who takes care of you?_

* * *

Clarke looked at the appointment schedule for today. Only one more to go then she could go home and get some sleep. She was exhausted. Patient after patient had come into today with complaints of one thing or another.

"Next please!" She called from the exam room. She had her back turned as the next patient came and sat on the exam room table.

She turned around to see an all too familiar pair of gray eyes looking at her expectedly. Cory Lowry had been a friend of Wells. He was two years older than Clarke and was an engineer. They had been in history class together since before she could remember.

Cory had wispy red hair and he now gelled back to lay flat against his skull. His gray eyes watched her with sick glee as she just stared at him.

"You're not supposed to be here." Was her automatic reaction.

"Oh come on, Clarke, even I get sick." He coughed lightly and was rather bad at faking it, of course he wasn't trying to convince anyone. "See, just a bit under the weather."

Clark let her hands fall to her side and took a step back. She felt her left hand begin to tremble. She wanted to scream and run out of the room straight into her mothers arms.

Only her father and known what Cory had done to her. Cory's father was on the council and a rather important man. If Clarke's father had confronted him directly, it would've made things hard for Abby. So instead he had dealt with the situation by framing Cory for drug distribution. It wasn't much of a stretch. Cory was addicted to a form of morphine and had been a major drug user for years.

"You were in priso-" Clarke whispered.

"Yeah, funny you should mention that. They let me out early, good behavior. That and they needed an engineer's take on the explosions. Guess there aren't that many engineers left anymore." Clarke's hand trembled even more. Soon she would be shaking like a leaf and couldn't let Cory see that. He would exploit any weakness.

Cory popped off the exam table and took a step closer to Clarke. The front of his body inches from her. Clarke froze. She felt so weak, powerless. This wasn't who she was. Cory placed his right leg straight between Clarke's planted feet. He leaded forward and reached above her into the cabinets and pulled out a large q-tip.

"Always loved these things. See ya around Clarke." He chuckled and walked out of the office.

Clarke sunk to the floor. Her body numb, but trembling. She couldn't stop the tears from leaking from her eyes. She covered her mouth to cover the sob. Her worst nightmare had been let out of his dungeon. And he definitely wasn't finished with her.

* * *

This story is just pouring out of me. I hope chapter 4 will be a quick write too. Please review.


	4. Chapter 4

Clarke swirled the stirrer in her cup of coffee as her mind drifted away. Lunch was the only time she was safe. If she stayed in the office Cory might find a way to get to her.

As she stirred she thought back to the way life seemed a lot easier four years ago. Her father was alive, all she had to worry about was school work and Wells and how to spend her time with her friends.

She used to be over at Wells' home every afternoon. Every spare minute she had was spent with him. They would always have something to discuss, whether it be school, gossip or just the way parents always seemed to wreck their kids life.

That wasn't really true, both their parents, for all their faults, had done their very best for each of them. They may not have liked what their parents had done, but they could never say it was in disservice to their lives.

Bellamy watched the cafeteria crowd with mild disinterest. They didn't really look like the rioting type, but after the food shortage, the multiple explosions and lack of medicine, everyone was more stressed than usual.

He caught sight of Clarke sipping her coffee alone. She was staring out the large window in the back of the cafeteria. She was sitting on the windowsill with one leg hanging down to the touch the floor while the other was pulled tight to her chest. She used her knees to prop her coffee up. He imagined that was her default position while thinking. She didn't seem to be interested in anything around her, her eyes never focusing on anything, just staring into the abyss of space. There wasn't a solar flare expected anytime soon, no comets, so there wasn't really anything worth looking at, yet her eyes never left the floating abyss they all lived in.

Bellamy noticed her left hand that was holding the coffee trembling slightly. He took in her features. She didn't look happy, or exhausted, she looked haunted.

He made his way over towards her, not caring about what anyone would say, he couldn't bear to see that look on someone who shouldn't ever be chased by ghosts. She was too young, too good to be damned. He was a lost cause, but not her.

He got there just in time to see her hand shake uncontrollably and her coffee cup fell to the floor.

"Shit." She barked and reached down to clean it up.

"I got it, I got it." Bellamy said beating her to it. He had a handful of napkins and was wiping it up before she could even reach down.

Clarke was momentarily shocked that Bellamy was there, "Cafeteria duty, huh?" She wanted so badly to reach out to him. Bellamy was strong, just like her father had been. He would know what to say, know what to do.

"Yeah, as shifts go, it's not the worst." Bellamy joked and threw the soiled napkins away. "You want me to go get you another cup?"

Clarke raised her eyebrows, "You got some kind of connection with the kitchen staff?"

Bellamy rubbed the back of his neck nervously and chuckled, "Yeah, you're right. My ration card is done for the day. They had biscuits and Octavia is a sucker for those." Clarke smiled. She stood and reached up moved a stray curly lock away from his eye.

As she was smoothing that stray hair down, movement over Bellamy's shoulder caught her eye. Cory walked into cafeteria and got in line for food. He ended up with his own cup of coffee and an extra in tow. He starting walking towards them. Her heart began to beat so fast, she felt the room begin to spin. Her hand turned to a fist at her side and her other dropped from Bellamy's hair. Bellamy turned to look at what she glaring at.

 _She looks like she's seen a ghost._ He thought as he caught sight of a red haired Alpha station engineer heading their way. He thought the guy's named might've been Sean or Craig. He couldn't be sure. He was around his age, 23 or 24.

"Saw that awesome klutz move you just pulled. Thought you might want another cup." Cory held out a fresh cup of coffee.

Bellamy took note of the way Clarke tensed as the guy got closer to her and Bellamy. Was she that afraid of being seen with Bellamy? Of course she was, he was Factory station and she was Alpha station, a councilor's daughter, the princess. He wasn't even part of the guard yet, just a pathetic cadet. All their interactions had been secret up until then and now he had gone and screwed it up. Everyone in the cafeteria could see them. She didn't answer Cory and started to walk away.

"Girls, huh?" Cory sand said to Bellamy and chuckled. He turned to walk away and sit by himself at a table closer to the entrance.

Bellamy followed Clarke into the hallway. She was walking so fast he had to basically run to catch up to her. "Clarke, wait." He had to apologize, had to try to talk to her. She couldn't take his stupidity out on O. It wasn't her fault her brother was a stupid asshole.

Clarke either didn't hear him or didn't want to hear him. Bellamy broke into a fast run and reached for her. His hand closed on her wrist.

Clarke turned so fast on him, he didn't see it coming, "LET ME GO!" She screamed and the punch threw him into the wall. It wasn't the force of the punch, though she did have a wicked left, it was the fact that Clarke hit him. Her eyes had been closed when she threw it, she couldn't know she hit him, but she was trembling by the time Bellamy hit the wall.

Clarke opened her eyes to see Bellamy on the floor shaking his head and looking dazed. Clarke looked at her hand curled into a fist and gasped. She hadn't meant to hurt him. She thought Cory had been chasing her, not Bellamy. Clarke turned and ran straight to medical wing. She ran into her office and closed the door panting.

Crumpling to the floor she covered her mouth. She had just punched one of the few friends she had.

"I can't do this. I can't do this." She kept chanting as the memory filled her head. Cory's voice saying, _"Shut up, it'll be over soon."_ His voice filling her head echoing into every beat of her heart. She covered her ears and began to rock back and forth. She just wanted it to be over. For four years she hadn't thought about that night, for four years she had had peace. Now that he was back, it was like she was still that frightened fourteen year old. Scared and alone and in the dark. Clark jumped up and ran to the one place Cory couldn't find her.

* * *

Once he got off shift, Bellamy headed home. He sank into their couch and gingerly touched the shiner had gifted him. It was a nasty black eye. He pulled out a frozen ice pack from their fridge and placed it on the puffy side of his face. He had to give it to Clarke she had a wicked left. And the weird thing was even those she punched the shit out of his face the fact that she could kick his ass made him smile. He'd be afraid if she had been given any kind of training. With that amount of natural talent she'd be unstoppable.

"Bells! What happened?" Octavia asked and then couldn't help the giggle that escaped, "I don't think I've ever seen you with a shiner."

"Thanks for your sympathy." Bellamy shot back at his sister still laughing at his shiner.

"Seriously, did someone in sparring get a lucky shot in? Were you glowering at Clarke again and Tim caught you unawares? Did she visit you in the training room?" Octavia asked siting next to her big brother on the couch.

"I don't glower." He said haughtily. Octavia scrunched up her face and squinted her eyes, trying to do a bad impression of him glowering he expected.

"You do this a lot. Maybe not so much glowering as glaring." Octavia took the ice pack and smacked it a little to make it more pliable to his face.

"Thanks, and no. Actually, Clarke smacked me a good one." He confessed.

"Why would Clarke hit you? What did you do?" Octavia asked panicking.

"I just spoke to her in the cafeteria. Other than that I don't know what I did. I think I embarrassed her in front of her friends." He said shrugging.

Octavia frowned at his words. On the one hand, Clarke was her best friend, on the other Bellamy was her big brother. She didn't want to choose between them, but Clarke shouldn't hit people for just talking to her. But Bellamy is Factory station. "Sorry big brother, I don't what to say."

"That's okay. Just forgive me if she doesn't come back. I really didn't mean for you to lose your friend." Octavia nodded and hugged him tightly. Bellamy hugged her with one arm. _

* * *

There was a knock at the door. Their mother was working late again, so it couldn't be her.

"Bellamy, open up, it's Tim!" Tim sounded excited.

"One second!" Bellamy bellowed and held the trap door open for Octavia to hid in. Once everything was secured he opened the door, "What's up?"

"You didn't here? You don't watch the bulletins?" Tim asked obviously thrilled about something. No he didn't watch the bulletins. Mostly they were information, what was being served in the cafeteria, what and where ration cards were being distributed, what shortages were occurring. Boring stuff basically.

Bellamy took the remote to monitor and flicked it on to the news station. Bulletins about everything was broadcast on it. In big yellow letters it read. "Missing Person Alert: Clark Griffin"

"The princess is missing. They're talking about mobilizing the entire guard to search for her. This is so great, I've never been apart of a search party. All the guards were talking about the last search they had two years ago. They found a kid that had tried to go into a part of Farm station that was locked due to radiation containment issues. They found his corpse all bloated and gross. Think that'll happen this time?"

"Why did they send the bulletin out? I saw Clarke at lunch this afternoon." Bellamy asked Tim.

Tim shrugged, "Don't know. Shumway said she didn't show up for her afternoon shift at medical wing. She was scheduled to scrub in on some important surgery. Her mom apparently went and screamed to the Chancellor about putting out a bulletin. Alpha station sure are drama queens. I've known some of the cadets to pull triple shifts and their parents wouldn't call for bulletins until they hadn't seen them for a straight week."

"You heading to the training center to volunteer for the search party?" Bellamy asked trying to seem calm, but his body was a tightly wound live wire.

"Yeah, you want me to save you a seat while we wait to be called?" Tim asked.

Bellamy shook his head, "I'll catch up. Gotta clean up you know." He looked down at his civilian clothes. Tim nodded in understanding and left.

Octavia burst forth from the hidden compartment, "What happened to Clarke?" She asked grabbing Bellamy's hand.

Bellamy shook his head, "I don't know. O, I have to try to find her. She could be somewhere hurt."

Bellamy ran to his bedroom and began to undress and pulled on his cadet uniform. Octavia opened his door, she didn't stick her head in order to avoid naked brother syndrome but she did speak through the crack in the door, "Bellamy?"

"Yeah O?" Bellamy was trying to hop into his boots, but it was proving more difficult than he thought. Adrenaline was flooding his system and making him a little shaky. Clarke couldn't be dead like that other missing kid.

"Make sure you check Clarke's secret place." Bellamy stopped trying to get dressed and walked over to his sister. He opened the door. Octavia squeaked and covered her eyes with both hands, "Gross! Shirtless brother! Cover it up! Cover it up!"

Bellamy ignored her immature pleas and pried her hands away from her eyes. He leaned down so he was level with her eyes, "Octavia, what are you talking about, and don't lie to me. I mean it."

"That one surprise inspection…you remember?" She asked.

"Uhuh, the one that Clarke hid you from." Bellamy finished for her.

"Clarke didn't take me to medical wing. I guess she was afraid her mom might show up. She took me to her hidden place. It's a bay off mecha station. It has the most beautiful view of earth and the stars. I wish I could go back. Plus she always has good food stashed there."

" _Of course. Those are from my secret stash. Been saving them up for months. They would just go to waste, I haven't been able to visit-….well never mind."_ Clarke must've been talking about her stash in this secret place.

"O, I need you to give me specific directions. Please." Bellamy pleaded. Octavia sat down and began to write the directions she could remember down. She hadn't been paying that much attention.

* * *

Bellamy reached mecha station quicker than he thought. Everyone was searching the more populated areas so he didn't encounter that much foot traffic.

"Okay, sliding panel should be here." Bellamy felt the panel slide easily and sighed in relief that he hadn't broken anything that wasn't already broken.

He walked further until he reached the bay O had spoken of. The ground was covered in lots of blankets. In one of the corners was a puddle of blankets arranged in a lump.

 _Oh God! Please don't be Clarke, please don't be dead, Clarke._ He thought frantically. He pulled the blankets away frantically uncovering her still form, but then he saw her breathe.

Bellamy sighed so hard his chest hurt.

"Please don't, please don't." Clarke whimpered her sleep. Her legs were scissoring desperately.

"Clarke?" Bellamy asked as he shook her shoulder. "Clarke, wake up." Clarke shot awake and backed into the corner closest to her.

She had her hands up in front of her. She was holding a pocket knife and staring at him like a wild animal.

Bellamy stayed crouched on one knee and held up his hands in front of him in the universal sign of _'I mean you no harm'_

"Clarke, I'm sorry I messed with you earlier today. Okay? I just had to make sure you were okay, I'll leave. Please just put the knife down." Bellamy pleaded.

"Bellamy?" Clarke asked and shook her head like she was a puppy trying to clear it's head after being dazed.

"Yeah, it's me." He said quietly trying not to scare her. Clarke dropped the knife and ran at him. She wrapped her arms around his neck and hugged him tightly.

Bellamy didn't know what to do. First, he took his foot and kicked that damn knife far away. Leaning back he sat on the floor. Clarke followed his movement and she ending up leaning into him.

Clarke starting to cry, that turned into to deep heaving sobs. Bellamy didn't know what to do. First, she punches him, then she holds a knife at him, now they were hugging and she was crying. He did the only thing he could think of. He rubbed soothing circles in her back, like he did for Octavia when she cried about something.

It seemed like Clarke cried for hours. Bellamy kept holding her and rubbing her back until the sobs turned into hiccups and then silence.

"Clarke? You in there?" He asked looking down at her. She had slid down and was now laying down with her head in his lap. She hand't spoken two words in hours.

"At fourteen, I had started my apprenticeship, but hadn't really studied anything about anatomy. Back then it was most procedural, how to start an I.V., how much tylenol you shouldn't have in a day. That kind of stuff."

Bellamy nodded.

Clarke couldn't see him nod, but she kept going, "I didn't know how much alcohol could affect your judgement." Before she could blink she was back in Wells home at that night.

 _Clarke smiled as Cory made another rude joke about farting. Wells laughed too. They all had the night off from parents. There was an emergency council meeting and with all their parents, even Cory's dad, being councilors they had a night free of parents._

 _Cory smirked and pulled out a bottle of clear liquid, "What's that?" Wells asked._

" _This is moonshine." Cory said and unscrewed the top. Clarke took a whiff and coughed. "Yeah, I don't think you guys can handle this." He screwed the top down and began to put it back in his bag._

" _No! We can totally handle it. We're practically adults. Right, Clarke?" Well's asked._

 _Clarke nodded and watched as Wells took a large sip and coughed a little. He passed the bottle to Clarke. Clarke took a swig and wheezed as she handed it back to Cory who took a small sip. After about three swigs Clarke felt dizzy and the room started to spin. When she stood up her head began to pound._

" _Wells, I'm going to take a nap, okay?" Clarke asked her best friend._

 _Wells was slumped over on the other end of the couch, "Yeah, sure." He slurred and fell asleep himself._

 _Clarke stumbled into Wells bedroom and flopped to the bed and passed out as soon as she hit the pillow._

 _Clarke awoke to sever nausea and something on top of her. She opened her eyes sluggishly and saw Cory rising above her. He was grunting and panting in her face. She felt pain as he began to rape her over and over and over again._

" _No! Get of-!" Cory covered Clarke's mouth with his hand and kept going. She tried to move, but he had arms pinned down with his other arm as he continued to push and grunt inside of her._

" _Shut up, it'll be over soon." He growled and he wouldn't stop, no matter how many times she tried to scream for help._

 _Once he was finished he rolled off of her and pulled up his pants. Clarke tried to pull her shirt back together to cover her breasts but the buttons were missing. Her jeans were ripped and the button missing, but the zipper still worked. Her underwear was missing and she was so cold. She pulled on one of Wells' oversized tshirts that reached to her knees to cover up. Her mouth hurt from Cory'S hand. She opened the door and saw Wells passed out on the couch snoring._

 _Cory was in the kitchen. He leaned on the counter and winked at her as she walked by, "That was fun." He jeered._

 _Clarke ran out the door and didn't stop until she reached her bedroom._

Bellamy was gripping Clarke's shoulder so tightly she hadn't even noticed, "Bellamy, that hurts." She must've spoken everything aloud. She didn't even remember doing it.

Bellamy instantly released her, "Sorry. Sorry." He murmured. Now he was the one staring out at into dense space. "Cory, that's the guy with the coffee this morning right?"

Clarke sat up and looked at his face. He looked murderous, "Yup that was him. He likes to torture me, bother me in the office, and the cafeteria. I had hoped he would just go away and find someone else to ruin, but I guess that was wishful thinking."

"Did you report it?" He asked.

She shook her head. "My dad found me and figured out what had happened. But Cory's father was Jaha's right hand man. Still is matter of fact. He knew that if he went to Jaha, Cory's father would either dismiss the charge or try to get covered up. Nothing would happen to Cory. Instead, my father stole a case of morphine from medical wing and planted it in Cory's bedroom. The council could excuse personal drug use, and could maybe cover up a rape, but they couldn't excuse drug peddling. He was arrested and thrown into the skybox for life."

"Why is he out?" Bellamy asked having a sinking feeling in his gut.

"Because of the two explosions they needed as many engineers as they could find. Cory is not only a bastard, but a genius. He has an eidetic memory and had already passed three different competencies for engineering at twelve years old. He may be the smartest person on the ship."

Bellamy was seething, "That doesn't give him the right to hurt anyone." He growled.

"I didn't say it did, just telling the facts" Clarke said dismissively and swiped a tear off her face. Bellamy saw her do it and reached across to wipe the other eye free of the offending tear. Clark leaned into his touch and sighed as he cupped her face gently.

"That's why you punched me today. You thought I was him and you were terrified." She nodded into his touch.

Bellamy leaned forward and cupped her face in both hands and met her eyes, "I won't let him hurt you. I'll take care of it." He said.

Clarke met his eyes and knew that he didn't mean reporting the incident to the guard or the council. He was going to kill Cory. Bellamy leaned back and tried to remove his hands, but Clarke grabbed onto them. She latched on and wouldn't let go, "No, Bellamy. You can't. He's a councilor's son, they'll float you for even trying."

"Fuck them. Let them try and stop me." He met her eyes a steely determined look swimming in their onyx depths. He already had a plan formed, she knew it.

"I can't lose you too." Clarke's voice broke as she spoke the words she was afraid of uttering. Even the thought of there being no more Bellamy Blake in her world hurt too much to even think about.

"Hey, hey hey. Nothing is going to happen to me." Bellamy whispered as he scooted closer to her. He pulled her into a hug and cradled her against him.

Clarke reached up and took his hand in hers. She held it so carefully and traced the scars on his knuckles. _I don't care anymore about pretenses. Being with him makes the nightmares go away. The shakes disappear when I'm in his arms._ Clarke gently kissed each knuckle. Each time her lips touched Bellamy's skin he took an involuntary breath, "Promise me you won't go after Cory. I can handle it. I'll report it. I'll promise to report it if you promise not to go after him."

Bellamy gritted his teeth. He wanted to kill that animal, not get him thrown back in prison. He couldn't make that promise, she deserved better of him. The one thing he was good at was protecting, and he would protect her until his last breath, "Bellamy, promise me." Clarke ordered more than asked.

He smiled, "Fine princess. I promise." She turned to look at him. She looked so vulnerable, so not like her. He wanted to wipe that hurt look off her face.

Reaching down to cup her chin, he brought her lips to his and gently kissed her. Clarke was so still while he kissed her, he knew he had fucked it up.

 _I'm such a shit. She just told me her darkest secret and I kiss her. I'm no better than that fuck who hurt her. Damn it._ Bellamy started to pull away, but Clarke wound her hands around his neck and ran her fingers into his hair as she kissed him back.

Bellamy slightly turned his head to make it easier to kiss her. He wrapped his hands around her waist and pulled her into his lap. Clark gasped as he ran his tongue along the seem of her lips asking for permission. She parting her lips and he took it as permission and began to kiss her deeply. She tugged at the hairs at his nape as he continued to drug her with his kids. He left a trail of kisses along her nape and collar bone. Every place he touched set her skin alight with sparks.

"Bellamy." She sighed and gripped his shoulders tightly when he ran his tongue along the hollow spot where her neck met her shoulder. Her fingers spasmsed when he began to suck at the sensitive skin there.

"Yes, princess?" He murmured as he kept playing her skin like a instrument and calling forth the most beautiful sounds from her throat.

"We can't." She said the words, but they didn't register with what her body was feeling. Her body was saying _"YES YES YES!"_

"Why not princess?" Bellamy asked his lips travelling back up her neck to meet her lips and capture another kiss. Bellamy couldn't stop his hands from touching every inch of her. He had dreamed of this. He was afraid he had lost even the dream this afternoon when she had punched him. All he wanted was Clarke, he didn't care about the rest of the world.

He left hand cradled her neck while the other rested on her right hip. His thumb tracing circles in the skin just above her jeans. Her skin tasted like citrus. Bellamy had never had an actual orange, but he doubted it could taste better than Clarke did.

"Please, please." Clarke pleaded with him. He smiled into the kiss. She didn't know what to ask for.

"Please what Clarke? What do you need?" Bellamy asked as her hands kneaded at his shoulders. He was going to erase that awful memory of her with this wonderful moment.

"I don't know." She sighed. Bellamy stopped kissing her and dropped his hands to the floor and leaned back. "Why did you stop?" Clarke asked.

Bellamy met her eyes, "I need you to know that nothing you don't want will happen here. If you want to keep going we can, if you want to stop, we can do that to. I won't touch you anymore without your express permission. Unless you ask me, I won't lay one finger on you. You are in control." He leaned back offering himself up to her in every way and Clarke licked her lips.

"What if I want to try some things, but not all the way? What if I get you ready and can't finish?" She asked shyly looking at the floor.

Bellamy waited until she met his eyes before answering, "Then I'll consider myself the luckiest guy in the world for being touched by you. Clarke, what do you want to do?" Bellamy leaned back on his arms and waited for to move.

Clarke bit her lip, she was in total control and wasn't that the hottest thing. She straddled his legs and Bellamy hissed out in pleasure through clenched teeth as she settled her jean covered center over his. His eyes met her, but he made no move to touch her.

Clarke leaned forward and placed a chase kiss on his neck. Bellamy's hands curled into fists, but he made no other movement. Clarke liked having him react to her this way. She felt powerful. Bellamy fracked each her movements with his eyes. He looked like a look tracking prey, but he never lost control. He never moved from his sitting position.

She ran her hands at the hem of his shirt and Bellamy's stomach muscles tensed under her shy touch. Clarke tugged at the shirt and Bellamy helped pulled it over his head. He leaned back and let her do what she wanted, even though it was killing him not to touch her.

Clark ran her hands over his strong chest muscles. He tried not to gasp when she leaned down and kissed right above his nipple. She trailed kisses down his chest and abs until she reached the barrier of his pants. She looked up and Bellamy almost lost it when she kissed the hard ridges of his stomach. Her lips paying attention to each muscles. He groaned when her tongue slid out and played along his skin.

"Bellamy? Did I hurt you?" She questioned as she pulled her hair to one side and looked up to meet his eyes. That noise he made was one of anguish.

"Only in a good way. I promise." He asked still reclining.

"Bellamy, please touch me." She asked. Bellamy had no trouble complying. He ran his hands up the back of her shirt until he felt her shiver in his arms. His other hand round it's way to the core of her through her jeans.

He held her neck and supported her as she arched under his touch. Even through clothes she was burning up, and he was dying to have her, but after what she told him, he was going to take his time with her. She wasn't some girl to bed and forget about, this was Clarke. The girl of his dreams. She thought she had saved him, but the truth was he didn't start living until he met her.

Clarke gasped as he used he heel of his hand to rub her through the thick denim. She felt a rush of liquid between her legs. She tried to clench her thighs, but it pressed Bellamy's tighter into her.

Clarke's nails were digging into Bellamy's shoulders and he loved it. She began to rock against his hand and he pushed it hard into her. She was letting go. Losing herself in the sensation and pleasure. This is the way she should've been loved. Clark gasped and cried out as she felt something that was pulled taught inside of her and unfurl with delicious heat. She came apart in his arms and he held her as she shuddered, her eyes closed in pleasure. Bellamy kissed her softly on the lips and cradled her as the aftershocks slowly dissipated.

"That was—Wow." She breathed.

"Glad you liked it." Bellamy joked and kissed her again.

"Can we do it again?" She asked, a blush heating her cheeks.

"Absolutely. And it only gets better. The more we get to know each other, what we each like, it'll be even better. I won't ever hurt you Clarke." Clarke smiled and this time she reached up and kissed him.

"Let's go so your mother doesn't rip apart the entire ship trying to find you." Bellamy said.

Clarke pursed her lips, "Come to think of it, how did you find me? And why is my mother looking for me?"

"O told me where to find you and your mother had Jaha send out a missing person's bulletin."

Clarke covered her mouth in horror, "No she didn't!" She said as Bellamy pulled his shirt back on.

"Yes she did. She raised holy hell about you missing some surgery. The entire guard is being mobilized to find you."

"Oh my god. I missed the Shuman surgery. I totally forgot." Bellamy helped her to stand.

"I think she'll be so happy to see you, she won't care about the stupid surgery."

Clarke nodded in agreement, "Wait." She touched his arm lightly as he moved the panel for her to go through first. He let it slide back into place and turned to face her. "Why did you think I punched you. You didn't know I thought you were Cory."

It was Bellamy's turn to be shy, he shrugged, "We had never talked in public. I thought you might be embarrassed to be seen-." Bellamy started.

Clarke took his face in her hands and kissed him lightly on the lips. She then kissed his eye lids and the made him face her. Her grip on his face fierce, "I am not ashamed of you, Bellamy Blake. I could never be afraid to be seen with you. You have such a good heart and you are a good man. You are worth twenty of those Alpha station idiots. I wouldn't trade you for the world. Do you understand me?" She shook her hands lightly around his face so he got the message. "You are worth more to me than anything else in this stupid shitty world. You are mine and I would never be prouder to have you by my side."

Bellamy felt the tears coming but tried to stop them. He couldn't break down in front of her. Not her. He tried to turn away. She didn't know what she saying, "Clarke, you don't-"

Clarke shoved him up against the wall of the bay. Angry that he would place such little value on himself, "You are the best man I know. You take care of your sister and your mother. You are a good man." Clarke placed her hand over his heart. "You're my heart, you dumbass. Don't you think that makes you worth something!"

Bellamy placed his hand over hers and pulled her into a crushing hug. She returned it in full wrapping her hands around his back and not letting go. She leaned up and placed her lips near his ear, "I love you, Bellamy." She whispered. She knew he heard him because he stopped breathing for a millisecond and then tightened his hold on her.

"I won't let anyone hurt you. I promise." He whispered his promise back to her. He couldn't say the words yet. He didn't think he deserved to say them. He would make it right.

* * *

Clarke sat at her desk drumming a pencil along the edge of a chart note she was currently working on. She couldn't get Bellamy's eyes out of her head. His mahagony orbs clouded with murderous rage. He was always quick to rage, she knew that about him. It bad frightened her at first, but now she knew it to be just part of his soul. He had been hurt by so many that he jumped to anger before any other emotion.

 _I have to do something. If he kills or even tries to kill Cory they'll float him._ Clarke looked down at her hands. Ever since she and Bellamy had kissed her, there hadn't been any more tremors.

 _You can do this. For him, you can do this._ Clarke realized she would have to do something. She couldn't turn Cory in. He would just weasel out of it somehow. She could frame him again, but that would take too long to arrange and if they truly needed engineers that badly they might dismiss the charges.

She looked at the schedule for the day and bit the inside of her cheek. Cory had scheduled a follow up appointment for his nonexistent cough. Clarke made a decision then. She would end things today and protect Bellamy for good. He wouldn't be blamed for this. She would take the consequences no matter what they were.

She placed her surgical instruments in the drawer directly behind the exam table. Not that unusual to store clean equipment there, but still not her usual place. She nodded to herself. She could do this and would do this, for him she would do anything.


	5. Chapter 5

Cory sat on the exam table swinging his feet as Clarke took a look at his chart. Clarke was for once grateful that her mom usually did her home visits in the afternoon as she wouldn't have to witness this.

"How's it looking doc? Am I gonna make it through the day?" He was purposefully trying to elicit a reaction, but she kept her cool. Her hand had a very slight tremor, but it barely showed. The ark had cameras in every wing, and every public arena. And her exam room had a camera for security purposes but she could choose to turn it off or keep it on. It didn't record sound but it did record images.

She could let it stay on with the patient's permission, "Do you mind if I leave the camera on during the examination?" She asked mildly.

He smirked, "Sure doc. But we both they won't be able to hear anything I say. So go ahead." Cory smiled cruelly and she knew the camera couldn't record it because of the angle.

"Thank you for your corporation." She replied.

Clarke reached out to grab her pen and his hand caught her wrist. Her first reaction was to jerk away. But she took a deep breath and looked at Cory.

"Please release me." She asked politely.

Cory didn't budge. In response to him touching her Clarke stepped back so that he would have to yank her towards him or get off the table to keep maintaining contact. He did what she thought he would. He stood up and backed her against the cabinets and counter top of the medical office.

"I missed this." He breathed against her skin. She had to control her stomach as the strong smell of spearmint wafted into her nostrils. That smell brought the fear from that night four years ago roaring back. But instead of collapsing into a heap, she pulled the memory of Bellamy hugging her tightly to the front her mind. Then she thought of Octavia and her smiling face as she twirled in a dress Clarke had brought her. Then she saw Bellamy smiling nervously while rubbing his neck.

 _For him._ She thought as she reached behind her without Cory noticing and palmed the scalpel from her surgery kit.

"Move back." Clarke said. Her voice was strong and she even surprised herself.

Cory cocked his head to the side and raised an eyebrow, "Did the princess grow a spine?" He released her wrist and ran his hand up the back of her jeans heading towards her butt. She knew what was he going to do before he did it. She steeled herself against him groping her.

Clarke looked him straight in the face, The thought of Bellamy giving her the strength she needed to do this, "How was prison Cory?" Cory became even more confused. "I imagine quite a fun experience. As you can only get a woman by taking her by force prison must've been a blast. So let me ask you, were you the butch or the bitch?" Clarke sneered, her nose crinkling at the sight of him, and gave him the once over from his toes to his head. "I'm betting the bitch, right?"

Cory growled something in articulate and grabbed her around the throat. Clarke fought the hold with one hand as he ripped the button on her jeans and fumbled at her under garments, "I'll show you who's the bitch." He snarled spittle flying on her face.

Clarke was starting to get dizzy from the lack of oxygen. But when he tried to pry her legs open with his knees she brought the scalpel up and shoved it into his carotid artery. Blood fountained from the wound and covered Clarke's face in gore. She tried not to choke on the iron taste filling her mouth and nose as he spurted what was left of his life onto her. Cory staggered back and slammed against the counter causing glasses and beakers to fall and shatter on the floor.

Clarke watched him stoically as he wrenched the scalpel from his neck. _Wrong move._ She thought as his blood spurred out more. He tried to stop it with his hands, but she knew she had hit her mark. Since he was standing his heart was pumping twice as hard as he had been when he sitting. He would loose consciousness in 3…2…1. He hit the floor his neck pumping out his life onto the floor. Clarke staggered to the door and hit the emergency alarm.

* * *

Bellamy used the bench press to exhaust himself. He was so frustrated. He had wanted to trail Cory during his daily routines today, but had been called onto shift at the last minute.

He had used the last of his salary, that wasn't used to purchase extra rations, to get a small portable tablet. The tablet connected to a vital sign bracelet that Clarke wore. It had been easy to hack the tablet to keep an eye on her. If her heart rest jumped at any time he would immediately be alerted and would know she was in trouble. It gave him peace of mind since he couldn't be with her every second.

Octavia had sketched a picture of him and Clarke both snoozing on the couch. He sat up and pulled he picture out. There she was; the best thing in his world. He folded the picture up and slipped it back in his pocket.

Bellamy leaned back to start another rep when an alarm started wailing from his pocket. He checked and saw it was Clarke's heart rate sky rocketing. Dropping the weight he ran for the door and sprinted through the hallways. Something was happening. _Hang on, Clarke. I'm coming. Just hold on._ He thought panicked at what she must be going through.

A piercing siren tore through the hallways. "Emergency Alert! Medical wing! Emergency Alert! Medical wing!" The computerized voice said in a calm voice while the alarm screeched. Bellamy felt his legs start to cramp as he ran faster and faster to get to Clarke. He panted so hard that his lung were on fire. The hallways flew by as he ate up the distance between the training room and medical wing.

He burst through the doors into the medial office. Shunway and Clarke's mom were watching something on a monitor. Bellamy ignored them and went straight to Clarke's side. She was sitting with her knees bent forward on the waiting room couch. Her hands were by her side and she was staring straight ahead blankly. Her hair was matted wet with fresh blood and her usually white lab coat was so coated with blood it looked maroon. Her face was coated in blood and only the tear tracks were free of the stuff. He began to look for wounds. He checked her hands, her neck her face. Everything was unmarred, but she was covered in so much red. It made his heart feel like it was going to beat out of his chest.

Bellamy went to his haunches in front of her, his voice cracking, "Clarke? Are you okay? Please talk to me."

Bellamy held his her face in his hands as he spoke to her, "Baby, talk to me." He whispered. Willing her to speak.

"I murdered him." She whispered in a numb voice.

"Who? Cory?" He asked watching her eyes dart around the room looking at nothing.

She nodded.

"Technically, you didn't murder him. This was a case of self defense. The footage shows him trying to rape you and you defending yourself." Shumway explained putting a friendly hand on her shoulder.

"Honey, it's okay." Abby Griffin said as she sat next to her daughter on the couch. "You did what you had to in order to survive. You didn't do anything wrong." Clarke nodded in agreement. She met Bellamys eyes. He was seething, waiting to explode. He was looking at her torn clothing, and he glanced at the dead body in the exam room.

"What are you doing here, Blake?" Shunway asked.

Clarke turned to Shunway, "He's here for me." Clarke said numbly.

Bellamy ignored Shunway's suspicious look and kept checking Clarke for injuries. Abby took the hand that Bellamy was holding and helped her daughter to stand, "Thank you Cadet Blake. I'm going to take her home." She turned Clarke and helped her to walk out. Abby ignored Bellamy as he tried to follow them.

"We'll handle the cleanup and get this place spotless." Shunway stated as Abby took her daughter out of the office. Bellamy turned to Shunway and waited for instructions.

"You handle the cleanup. I'll go give my report to The Chancellor." Shunway said and left the office. Bellamy took in the scene. He saw Cory laying face down on the ground. He looked and saw Clarke's bloody hand print on the table where she must've used it to help balance her stance.

 _I'm such a useless prick._ Bellamy thought as he looked at this disaster. _The one person in my life who needed protecting and I couldn't even do that right._

Bellamy pulled out a tarp from an supply closet and rolled Cory's body onto it. Once he had Cory secure he began to sweep up the broken glass. Once disposed of he wiped up the blood and anything the blood touched he threw in the incinerator tube. Reaching down he threw Cory over his shoulder and lifted. He carried Cory to the morgue and checked the body in. Shumway said there wouldn't even be a trial let alone an arrest so he threw the scalpel and other evidence in the incinerator.

He looked at his clothes. They were covered in blood and thick with other things. He decided to go home, change and then go check on Clarke. Damned if her mother liked him or not. At least that was what he thought before he was standing in front of Clarke's door. Now he felt like a scared boy about to meet the boogeyman. If Clarke's mother didn't let him see he didn't know what he would.

He knocked twice and cleared his throat while trying to smooth down his hair as best he could.

"Cadet Blake?" Abby griffin greeted him.

"Yes mam. I wanted to check on Clarke." He didn't mince words nor did he pay her any compliments. He knew that she thought her daughter could do better. She probably wasn't too wrong about that. But he wasn't leaving without a fight. "Come in, Clarke is in the shower." Bellamy stood just inside the doorway until she motioned him to sit on the couch. He had never been inside an Alpha station living cell before. It was different from factory station. Pictures hung everywhere. Pictures of their family. There was a bowl of fresh fruit on the kitchen counter and the monitor to watch videos was three times the size the one in his home. Abby handed him a glass of something fizzy. The carbonation tickled his nose and made him sneeze, but he gulped it down. It was like liquid heaven. It soothed his thirst and made him more awake with energy. Why in the hell would Clarke ever come down to Factory station when she had all this?

"So, you're one of Clarke's friends?" Abby asked as she leaned against the kitchen counter facing Bellamy.

Bellamy nodded wordlessly.

"That's good. She hasn't had a lot of time to make friends since her father died."

Someone knocked loudly on the door and Abby left Bellamy to get it. She opened it to reveal Wells standing in his pjs and holding chocolate covered peanuts, a bag of potatoes chips and a bottle of whatever drink Abby had served Bellamy.

"How is she?" Wells asked before he noticed Bellamy sitting on the couch.

"She's been better, but I'm confident if anyone can survive this Clarke can." Abby responded and helped Wells carry the food to the kitchen. Bellamy watched in jealously at how at ease Wells seemed in Clarke's home.

Wells came and sat on the couch, he extended his hand to Bellamy. "Hey man. How's it going?" He asked and Bellamy sputtered. Wells was so easy going about everything. Bellamy took his hand and let Wells shake it as he stared completely taken by surprise. "You here for my girl?" He asked. Bellamy was so confused.

"Your girl?" Bellamy asked angry pooling in his belly.

"Man! You should see your face. This guy. I'm joking with you. You are more my type than Clarke." Wells stated and threw a few peanuts into his mouth.

 _Am in la-la land or did the chancellor's only son just admit he batted for the other team?_ Bellamy thought.

"Did you just-" Bellamy started.

"Yeah man. I'm gay. Clarke has known for years. She never told anybody, she's my best friend." Wells countered and popped the top off the fizzy drink.

Bellamy nodded like that made it all make sense, "Seriously Abby, how's she doing?" Wells asked.

Bellamy watched Clarke's mom think for a minute and shrug, "She won't talk about it, but I think she is beating herself up over it."

"Over that creep? That douchebag got me and Clarke drunk at fourteen and the prick had the nerve to blame bringing the alcohol on me. Luckily, my dad isn't that big of a chump." Well said and cracked his knuckles, "Good riddance to bad rubbish." _Obviously Clarke hadn't told Wells about all that happened that night._ Bellamy thought.

"I second that." Bellamy agreed.

"My man." Wells joked and punched him in the shoulder. Bellamy rubbed the spot where Wells had punched him. It was like he had entered the twilight zone. He was sitting in a Alpha station living room, in the princess' room right next to the prince. And he couldn't help the small smile that crept onto his face. He could see why so many people loved Wells. He was at ease anywhere and around anyone.

"Mom, I'm going to go for a walk okay?" Clarke said as she opened her bedroom door. Then she caught sight of the two men on her couch.

Wells hopped up and enveloped her in a bear hug. Clarke returned it with a smile. "Look, I brought you your favorite go-tos. Come get me if you need to talk. Now I'm gonna leave and let you two handle this situation." Clarke laughed at Bellamy's face when Wells kissed her on the cheek and danced out of the room. I guess to a stranger Wells might seem a little much, but to her he was always the same as they were when they were little kids. He had never lost that child at heart that most people seem to lose as they grow up. It made her sad to think that if he became chancellor she wouldn't see that look or hear that laugh ever again. Jaha hardly seemed like the dancing type.

"Hey, you okay?" Bellamy asked taking her by the forearm gently and leading her to the couch, but she didn't sit.

"Yeah, I'm just tired of everyone asking me that." She replied and he smiled.

"Still want to go for that walk?" Bellamy asked. She nodded. He looked to Abby for permission and she nodded in acquiescence. Bellamy took Clarke's hand and guided her into the ball. Abby watched and seriously thought what would happen if Bellamy Blake became her son-in-law and shook her head in disbelief.

* * *

Bellamy walked silently beside Clarke. He let her set the pace as the walked through the halls together. He was careful not to reach out to her or touch her. She seemed like a skittish rabbit. He waited for her talk and was happy to just be by her side. The thought that he could've lost her today made it hard to catch his breath. His eyes drifted down to her neck. He could see the imprints of Cory's fingers left wrapped around her neck like a sick tattoo. Her wrists were bruised from where he pressed her against the table. His anger grew with every step he took. He wanted to kill Cory, but he was also so angry at Clarke. How could she out herself at risk like that? Didn't she know that she was the only thing in this world that he didn't have to claw his way to. She was the light in his life. Her laughter the only thing that made him smile. She should've called him the moment she saw Cory's name on the appointment list.

Clarke felt Bellamys anger. His body was literally radiating with it. Instead of saying anything she took his hand and held it in hers and continued to walk.

Bellamy's rage melted away when she took his hand. He looked around and noticed that as they walked along people stared at her and him. At their joined hands. At the way Clarke clung to him like a lifeline. She really didn't care what they all thought. Her fingers wrapped around his tighter and Bellamy stood taller against all those surprised looks. Clarke had chosen him to be hers and she didn't care who knew.

Bellamy opened his front door with Clarke in tow. Octavia was asleep in their mother's bedroom, "I'll fix you something to eat." He said and headed to the kitchen. Clarke sat on the couch and watched him move around the kitchen. He was obviously comfortable there, had cooked dinner before for his family.

Clarke couldn't help it. She came up behind Bellamy as he was putting sandwiches together. She wrapped her arms around him from the back. He stopped what he was doing and placed his hands over hers resting on his lower waist.

"You're trying to distract and all I want to do is feed you." He grumbled as her hands kept roaming along his chest and around his sides.

"I'm not hungry." Clarke murmured against his back as she dropped her forehead to rest against the warmth of skin through the t-shirt he was dressed.

"Liar." He accused and continued to try to ignore her touch. There was no reason not to enjoy themselves. His mother was staying with the guard that they all pretended she didn't sleep with and Octavia was sound asleep. Clarke's hands slipped under his jeans and his hands stuttered on cutting an onion for the sandwiches.

Bellamy leaned his head against the cabinets and tried not to moan when her fingers grasped him through his briefs, "Clarke." He whispered desperately trying to be the good guy, not turning around. If he turned around he would take her where she stood.

"Yes?" She asked her teeth digging into his skin through the fabric of his t-shirt as she playfully bit him tried right below his shoulder blade.

"You've just been through something traumatic. I don't want our first time to be like this. Tainted by him." Clarke withdrew her hands and placed them back around his front.

"I'll be good. I promise." She said against his skin, still holding him, "But I can't help wanting to touch you. You make the nightmares go away. And I want to see what you tasted like." Her voice was husky as she said it.

Bellamy turned around and kissed her. Clarke gasped and he took the moment to kiss her deeper and their tongues danced together as Bellamy tried to remember why they couldn't make love. She accepted his kiss and reached up to play her fingers in his hair. He grunted when she jumped up and wrapped her legs around his waist. He cupped her thighs so she wouldn't fall and staggered into the living room. Deftly he maneuvered her to laying down on the couch as he sat on the floor.

She propped herself on one arm and looked at him, "You're really serious. You won't make love to me."

Bellamy refused to look at her. If he saw her flush, her lips swollen, her eyes flooded with pleasure, he might not be able to stop himself. He stared ahead at the movie playing on the monitor, "Yes. I'm serious."

Clarke groaned in frustration and hit the pillow she was laying on. She screamed into it, "Fine. Pass me the sandwich." Clarke said and held out her hand. Bellamy had retrieved the sandwich and gave half to her. Clarke munched on it as they both watched the movie. "I really hate you right now." She grumbled around her food.

"I know." Bellamy said with a little smile. She didn't hate him, she loved him.

* * *

Sorry for the shorter chapter, but it was an intense write. That death scene kind of took it out of me. Please review and tell me what you think of it.


	6. Chapter 6

Fair Warning: This chapter contains full fledged lemon. If you don't know what a lemon is...google please.

* * *

Bellamy stared at her and couldn't beleive she was really here in his arms. Clarke murmured in her sleep. Her head was on his chest as she curled her arm around his waist and tugged as the dream made her talk.

Bellamy smiled as she growled something in her sleep. He was pretty sure he heard his name. He wasn't sure how to tell her this, but Clarke snored. It was kind of cute, but he doubted she knew about it. He brushed her hair from her face and watched as she slowly wrined her nose and blinked her eyes open.

"Didn't mean to walk you up." He said quietly.

Clarke turned her eyes up to meet his, "I don't mind waking up like this." She said her eyes still sleepy. "You chase away all the bad dreams." She said happily and stretched. "What time is it?" Her voice was muffled against his chest as she rubbed her head there like a cat wanting to be petted.

"Early or late depending on how you look at it." Clarke rolled onto her back her arm crossing over her eyes and sighed.

"That's it for me sleeping then." She grumbled to herself. Once she was awake she usually didn't go back to sleep.

Bellamy caught her other hand laying to her side and took it in his own, "Hey. I want to say I'm sorry." Bellamy voice was soft as he brought her hand to his mouth. Lightly he kissed the her bruised knuckles. Cory had pinned her hand against the table and that more than any other injury disturbed him. Clarke's hands were the tools she used to save lives with. That Cory had damaged them angered him to no end.

"Sorry for what?" She asked turning in his arms. She gazed up at him as his thumb traced circles in the soft skin on the back of her hand.

"That you had to kill him." He whispered so softly that Clarke barely heard him. "It should've been me. You don't deserve to have his blood on her soul."

Clarke reached her hand up and cupped the side of his face. Bellamy turned into her touch, his eyes closing.

"It wasn't your fault. You hear me? This was my demon and I had to slay it. I don't regret it and I would rather have my soul stained than yours. Don't you get it you stupid guy?"

Bellamy's eye met hers as he shook his head, "You are my heart. I can't risk losing you for anything. His life wasn't worth yours." She whsipered as she kissed the top of his chest through his shirt.

"I won't let anything hurt you Clarke. I promise." He made that promise to himself as well.

"I know." Her voice soothed the hurt within him. If she could forgive him for not being able to save her, he would forgive himself. She poked his stomach and he looked down, "I also know that you are tracking my vitals through this thing." Clarke held up her hand with the wrist bracelette.

"Uhhh." Bellamy started smiling and laughing nervously as he rubbed the back of his neck.

"Did you think I would find out? Did you think you would get away with it?" Clarke teased and crawled up into his lap straddling his thighs.

Bellamy's hands ran on her thighs as she pulled her shirt over her head.

"Is this my punishment?" He whispered reverently as he looked at the silky white skin she had exposed. He was thoroughly prepared to accept his sentence.

"Yes and no. I'm going to kiss the life out of you, Bellamy Blake. And then leave you wanting more." She joked and leaned down to nibble on his ear love.

Bellamy's hands tensed on her skin as she sucked at the sensitive skin.

* * *

 _Best punishment ever._ He thought as Clarke began to kiss him. She had disrobed to just her bra and pantries, but she had respected his wishes to wait and given him what he thought was the best tongue lashing he had ever received.

Bellamy couldn't stop smiling. He and Clarke had been together for two months and he had never been happier. Clarke usually spent three nights a week with him. Her mother had not been exactly thrilled when Clarke told her where she spent her time, but she also figured out that pushing Clarke wasn't going to work. His girl didn't buckle under pressure, especially parental pressure.

His girl. He couldn't believe that he got to call her that. Strangely, nothing else had changed in their lives. Clarke was still doing what she needed to finish her medical apprenticeship and Bellamy was three weeks away from graduating Vader training and becoming one of the guard.

So far, only three other cadets and he had finished their competencies with satisfactory marks. Octavia had thrown him a mini-celebration when she found out he had passed. The physical tests were easily passable. The only thing left was paperwork.

The best days or nights were when Clarke spent the night in his bedroom. He still hadn't made his move to do more than actually sleep next to her all night, but when she was in his arms, he didn't feel alone. He felt like their life together could actually work out. Clarke would eventually inherit her mother's title as councilor. That was the only thing that he was worried about. A councilor's life was always under a microscope and if Clarke stayed with him they risked Octavia being discovered, but Clarke didn't seem too worried about it.

He fingered the piece of jewelry now in his hand. It was small and probably nothing like she already had, but it had taken him the entire two months to save up enough to trade for it. The necklace was a simple silver chain. In the middle there was a tiny blue sapphire surrounded by a setting in filigree. It reminded him of her blue eyes. It was perfect and he couldn't wait to give it to her.

"Tomorrow night." He thought aloud. They both had already put a request in to be off tomorrow. It was a Friday night so they would be completely alone and they had agreed to meet in her secret place. Bellamy had made Clarke promise she wouldn't go into that room until that night. He had been fixing it up for the night.

He had placed over a dozen candles, he had her favorite snacks and that fizzy drink she loved. They would eat dinner together and he would show her how much he loved her by proposing to her with the sapphire necklace. It was going to be perfect.

Clarke twiddled her thumbs sitting next to Wells in his living room. The Chancellor had requested her presence along with her mother and Wells in his home.

Abby and Jaha stood close together. They had been talking in low tones amongst themselves for almost fifteen minutes.

"Do you have any idea what this about?" Clarke asked Wells who looked as dumbfounded as she was.

"No clue. Dad just pulled me out of a training seminar for this discussion." When he said discussion, Wells made the air quotes motion. He shrugged and threw a candied pecan into his mouth and watched both their parents continue to talk.

"Glad you both could make this meeting." Jaha finally addressed them.

Clarke rolled her eyes, "No offense Chancellor, but we were forced to make this meeting. My mom canceled a pretty big procedure in order to fit it in, so can we please get on with it?" Clarke asked.

Jaha smiled at her, "Quite right, Clarke. Quite right. Abby, you want to start?"

Abby stepped forward and placed her hands in front of her. Clarke leaned her head on her hand as her elbow rested on the table in front of them. When her mother talked with her hands, it was going to be a long conversation.

"You both are aware of the shortages and difficulties the Ark is facing?"

Clarke looked at Wells and nodded, "Yeah, the crop for the new shipment of meds failed. So we literally have no antibiotics or pain killers."

"And there's the food shortage. Farm station is not only having problems with fruits and veggies, they're having difficulty growing protein. Something about the air filtration system." Wells finished.

"Exactly. On top of that, Mecha station is starting to malfunction more often. Eventually we won't be able to save it and in turn our air supply will dwindle until death is inevitable for everyone on board."

Clarke bobbed her head, "Yes mom. We know this. Us four are the only ones on the entire Ark that know that. What's your point? That we are all going to die? Already knew that."

"Abby and I and the rest of the council have been trying to find a way to distract the populace from this crushing news." Jaha explained.

Wells sat back in his seat and Clarke raised her eyebrow, "Distract? There is no way to distract whats left of the entire human race that the Ark is dying." Clarke said.

"Actually there is. We," Jaha motioned to Abby and indicated the other councilor members not present, "believe that a marriage announcement would distract the populace enough to give us time to fix the problem."

Clarke snorted, "Who's important enough that getting married would just magically make all our problems go away."

Abby looked at Clarke and then to Wells, "No fucking way." Wells got the message first.

It took Clarke a few seconds, but when she caught on she felt the smirk slide off her face and hit the floor, "Whoa, whoa, whoa, Wells and I?"

Abby nodded and Jaha genuinely smiled. Clarke started to laugh and couldn't stop it. Wells sat stunned and just stared at both their parents as if they'd grown a third eye right between their foreheads, "I hate to break it to you, but Wells' funky monkey doesn't do any dancing for the likes of me." Clarke said referring to Wells being gay. She flinched and then looked to Wells, "You have told your dad you're gay, right?"

Wells nodded to her question and still kept starting at tfheir parents. Clarke had to admit, it was the first time she'd seen Wells stunned into real silence. Not even a snarky joke came out of him.

"It would be a political marriage, Clarke. You don't have to love each, or even be attracted to marry each other." Jaha said it like that was supposed to make them feel any better.

"You make it sound like a business arrangement. Personally, I had my version of my dream wedding. Wells was going to be the best man, not the groom." Clarke said trying to lighten the moment. They couldn't be serious.

"Clarke, we need this. This will be the event of the year. The entire Ark will be invited to the wedding and the reception. It will be talked about for months and it will give our people hope for the next generation of leaders. You two." He pointed to both of them.

"What are you talking about?" Wells asked.

"Don't you see?" Abby asked, "Thelonius and I would abdicate our council seats and become advisors. You both would assume our roles, Wells as Chancellor and Clark you would be a councilor. You would both inherit the generational votes. Together you would have-."

"Majority voting power." Wells finished for her. He was always better at this political stuff than Clarke. She just patched up soldiers, he was the one who began training to be the next chancellor since birth. It made sense he got this quicker than her.

"What?" Clarke asked Wells.

"You have your mother's three votes. I would have my father's four votes. You need a vote of five or more for the vote to swing your way. Either way, if we voted together, there is nothing we couldn't control." Wells explained. It did have possiblities. With Clarke and him in charge, they could change all the stupid segregation laws. Make everyone equal.

"Are we seriously considering this? No offense, but I actually have someone I love. Someone that I saw a future with, and now I have to marry Wells for political bullshit? This is a bandaid for heart attack. It won't fix the bigger issue of the Ark dying." Clark argued.

"But it might give us the time to try and save everyone." Jaha rebutted.

"You're both losing it if you think I'm marrying Wells." Clarke said and turned to leave.

"Clarke, I can't force you to do this, but there are considerations you need to think about." Jaha said taking a seat across from her.

"Such as?" She countered.

"Give me the room please. I need to talk to Clarke privately." Jaha directed his order to both Wells and Abby.

"Anything you need to say to Clarke you can say in front of me." Abby said defensively. Apparently this wasn't part of the two man plan to convince Wells and Clarke to marry happily ever fucked up after.

"Abby, I just don't want to embarrass Clarke." Jaha said kindly. Abby nodded, but placed a hand on Clarke's shoulder for support before she left.

"Thanks mom." She murmured under her breath.

"Clarke, I know this is a difficult decision. Especially, with your unconventional relationship with Bellamy Blake just starting out." Jaha said not unkindly.

"Fuck you." Clarke growled. She curled her fingers into fists and wanted to pummel that slick smile right off his face.

"Clarke, do you know what I do every day after the council meets?"

"Take a piss?" Clarke knew she was be unseasonably rude compared to her usually docile demeanor, but Jaha had always rubbed her the wrong way. And now after killing her father she felt nothing but hate towards him.

"No. I go over budgets and inventory. I noticed a slight discrepancy in the medical logs about three months ago. A large amount of antibiotics were used on you." Clarke kept her face a mask of blankness.

"It's strange. Because I don't really remember you looking that under the weather. And the amount used, well you would've have had to been so sick your mother would've told me. Then I checked the appointment log. You hadn't logged any patients, but your mother did make a note of Cadet Blake being in the exam room after hours."

Clark said nothing.

"So, looking at the evidence, it looks like Cadet Blake was under the weather with a nasty cold and even during the medicine shortage, you used your medical ration card to allow him to have antibiotics. I don't blame you for this Clarke. Like your mother, you feel so much for your patients. At the time I decided to let this go. There was no need for it to come to light. It would only incite more tensions between the stations. However, once you started a relationship with this young man, it became a different matter. It looks now that you abused your power, power given to you by the council, to give this young man drugs."

"It was vancomycin, not morphine. I was not selling drugs." Clarke said through gritted teeth.

"I know that, you know that and the log states that. However, with this kind of repitive delinquent behavior we don't know if you lied or not. Because as you know, your mother and you are the only ones that monitor the medical supplies. I would hate for her to be implicated as well. Plus, Cadet Blake would have had to been complicit in the theft of the medicine and you would have to at the very least go to trial for drug peddling. If found guilty, it could be a life sentence in the sky box or even being floated."

"This your version of blackmail?" Clarke said trying not to let her fear show through.

"This is my version of trying to help you make the right decision." Clarke looked at her hands.

"If you choose to marry Wells, then you can pardon whomever you wish for any crime, including Bellamy Blake." Jaha finished.

 _Bellamy would lose everything. Plus they would have to tear apart his pod to make sure he wasn't in possession of any other illegally obtained drugs. They would find Octavia and Bellamy would lose his mother and sister. If I married Wells, I could pardon Bellamy and his mother and Octavia could come out of hiding._

"If I agree, nothing happens to him?" She asked her bottom lip trembling.

"Of course. That young man has a bright future ahead of him." Jaha said jovially.

"Fine." Clarke said and wiped away the tear from her cheek.

"Clarke, please don't let your emotions cloud this decision. You made the right one. Plus, you can love whomever you want. Wells will more than likely have his own side piece, because as we know, he doesn't fancy blondes." Jaha couldn't help but laugh at his own joke.

He opened the door for Wells and Abby to join them again.

"Clarke, you okay?" Wells asked. His friend looked tortured.

"Yep. Fine." Clarke slapped on her happy fake mask.

"Alright, so the ceremony will be the day after tomorrow. We've already reserved the main training center room. It's the only room big enough. Oh, and you have to be fitted for your wedding dress young lady." Jaha said clapping his hands.

"Two days? You weren't going to let us say no, were you?" Clarke asked incredulously.

"But you said yes, so it shouldn't matter. Just good planning." Jaha smiled and watched as Clarke sank in on herself.

Bellamy hi fived Tim at the end of shift. They were about to work out when they saw all the matts being lifted off the floor. Workers were also removing the weights from the room.

"What's going on?" Tim asked.

"Gotta get ready for the big party." One of the workers explained as he took apart the bench press.

"Party?" Bellamy asked, "Someone celebrating a birthday?"

"Even better. Wells Jaha and Clarke Griffin are getting married." Bellamy stopped breathing when that sentence was uttered.

"You have got to be kidding me!" Tim shouted, "Oh my God! This is going to be an epic party!"

"I know, right! And get this the whole Ark is invited to the ceremony and the reception. No one is excluded!" The worked said.

Bellamy didn't hear anything but his heartbeat in his ears. They had to be wrong, Clarke marry Wells? How was that even possible. He was walking towards the door to the training center rand didn't even remember dropping his bag on the floor next to Tim.

"Hey! Bellamy, you dropped this!" Tim held up his bag. Bellamy kept walking.

Bellamy walked towards Alpha station and turned left heading towards medical wing. He walked in and saw Jackson sitting in Clarke chair, "Where's Clarke?" He asked.

Jackson looked up and got to his feet, "Sorry man, unless it's urgent the medical office will be closed today and tomorrow. Clarke is getting married and her mom is part of the ceremony." Jackson explained.

Bellamy's face went bloodless. He felt as if the floor was pulled out from under him. Jackson caught him as his knee buckled, "You okay man?"

Bellamy didn't respond, just stared at the blood stain on the floor from where Cory had bled out.

"I have to find her." He breathed out as Jackson helped him to stand.

"Find who?" Jackson asked, but Bellamy didn't respond and walked out.

Clarke sat in the classroom. Apparently, it was the only room with the best light for the fitting. She stood as the seamstress poked and pinned and fluffed the dress. It was a monstrosity of a dress. The ruffles cascading outwards in white waves almost three feet behind her.

"Mother, it's fitted. Can I have one last day to myself. I need to go talk to Bellamy." Clarke asked trying to keep it together. In truth, she was screaming inside. She looked at her watch. It was almost nine o'clock at night. She had been ferreted around all day to different wedding arenas. First she had to be measured for the tiara, then the veil, then the dress, which had taken at least four hours. She couldn't imagine what Bellamy was thinking or doing. She only hope she got to him before he heard from someone else.

Thirty minutes later Clarke breathed a sigh of relief. She was free of that wedding dress that felt like it a suffocating her each time its gauzy whiteness wrapped around her.

She headed towards her secret place and hoped that he would be there too.

* * *

Bellamy sat staring at the stars. How could Clarke do this? Marry Wells? Someone must be making her do it. Wells and her were like brother and sister, not lovers.

Clarke came in through her secret entrance and stopped walking forward as she met Bellamy's broken eyes.

 _He's been crying._ She thought looking at his face. Bellamy scrubbed at his face and got to his feet.

"Why didn't you tell me?" He asked from across the room.

"Tell you what?" Clarke asked, genuinely confused. She hadn't known about this deal until today either. It was news to her as well.

"That you loved being the princess more than me." He said gritting his teeth. "Why play games with me? Did you want to go slumming and I seemed like the perfect fit? Was I just something to toy with until you got bored and had to go back to real life."

Clarke ran up to him and put her hand over his mouth, "Shh, shhh, shhh, please don't say that." She begged, a sob coming up in her throat.

Bellamy didn't touch her, kept his hands to the side. He waited until she composed herself. He wasn't buying it until she looked up and met his eyes, "I don't want this, but I have to. Don't you understand."

Bellamy instantly pulled her to ground and sat in front of her, "Explain it to me. Because right now nothing makes sense. You and I, we are happy together right?" He asked.

She nodded.

"And we're good together and I knowyou love me. Why are you marrying that guy?" He asked in a broken whisper.

"I have to." Clarke said staring at her hands.

"Why?" Bellamy asked, but Clarke shook her head. "Tell me." He said grabbing her shoulders, "I deserve that much." They were quiet for a long time, "Do you love him?" He couldn't bear to see her eyes when she answered so he closed his own.

"No. I love you." She whispered placing her hand over his on her shoulder.

"No, you can't love someone and do this to them!" Bellamy cried out and dropped his hands.

"Bellamy, I love only you. I am doing this for you…for us." She stuttered as the tears came quicker. Bellamy didn't respond. He just let his body go limp.

"Bellamy?" Clarke touched his face, but he didn't move. "Bellamy, why won't you speak to me?"

"I'm nothing but something you used to get over your nightmares. Just a fuck toy." He ground out as she cupped his check. Clarke looked stricken as he said those words.

"No, please don't. This is the only night I get to be with you. I'll be forever tied to Wells after this. Please don't make it a fight." She whispered in horror.

"Tell me why." He begged. He reached out and cupped her face in his hands. She turned and nuzzled his hand. Inhaling his scent. "Please, tell me." He pleaded his heart in his throat.

"If I marry Wells, I'll instantly ascend to the title of Councilor and Wells will become Chancellor. Our parents will abdicate. We'll be the most powerful couple on the Ark. Our votes together would outvote anyone else. I could make sure you were made Chief of the Guard. You would never have to fight to get Octavia rations. You would be set for life." She lied. She didn't want to tell him the truth, she couldn't hurt him.

Bellamy gripped the back of her head and tugged her lips down to his, his kiss as bruising as his grip, "I-I"He started gasping, "I won't trade you for some job." He sobbed. "Not you."

Clarke kissed him back, as his grip softened, "Please don't cry." She pulled him into a hug. Bellamy wrapped his arms around her and buried his face in the wavy curls at her neck.

"Please don't leave me." He sounded like the little lost boy who had held his sister and begged his mother to help. "Please don't leave." He begged holding her tighter. Clarke returned his embrace and cried into the front of his shirt. Her fingers gripped his shirt so tightly that her hands were bloodless.

"I have to. He knows." She said muffled by his shirt. Maybe if he didn't hear she could escape the truth. The consequences of what she had done.

"Knows what?" Bellamy asked pulling her to look at him in the eye.

"Jaha knew that I used my I.D. to save you. He threatened you. He said he would have you labeled as a drug user." She kissed his hand while she said it.

"I don't care about me." Bellamy said.

"It wasn't just you he threatened. If you're labeled a drug dealer, they'll tear your home apart. They'll find Octavia. They'll jail her until she's eighteen and float your mother. They'll probably float you for good measure. He said my mother would be implicated too," Clarke breathed as more tears escaped.

Bellamy wiped them away. He knew she was making the logical choice. It would save them all. It would help everyone, "I can pardon you. Once I'm a councilor, Wells will vote with me. We can pardon you, Octavia and your mother. We'll have the votes."

Bellamy understood that. He even secretly hoped for it in his mind, but his heart wouldn't listen, "I can't lose you. I love-" He started. "I love you." Bellamy sighed as soon as he said it. It hurt to say, to know that she was going to be someone's else wife. He wanted her to wear his ring, be in his bed, bear his children. Not Wells.

Clarke continued to cry at his admission, "Please, please Bellamy. Please give me this night. Please don't send me away." Clarke pleaded in hiccuping sobs.

Bellamy pulled her into his lap and cradled her as she curled into a ball of tears, "I can't give you to him."

"Then give me tonight. Let me love you." Clarke asked her hand on his thigh holding so tight.

Bellamy nodded wordlessly. Clarke reached up and kissed him so gently it brought a sound from his chest. She was so gentle with him. She treated him like he was so fragile, so breakable. But he wanted to be her strength. Her rock, but she touched him as if he wasn't real and she was afraid she was going to lose him.

Bellamy pulled his shirt over his head. Clarke took in the sight of him sitting before her. No bruises tonight, the only scars marring him where the four she helped seal the first night she met him. She touched each one and enjoyed the intake of breathe she earned each time her finger grazed the lightened skin. Clarke reached down to his pants and unbuttoned the fly with such patience. She was frightened, but also excited. This was her one night with Bellamy.

She wouldn't cling to him as Jaha had suggested. She would make a clean break and let him fall in love with someone else. He would marry someone else and have children with someone else. Those thoughts brought tears to her eyes. The memories of children with black curls and deep brown eyes and endless freckles. The memories of children she would never have would haunt her, but he would be happy. Not stuck in some lifeless affair where he could only have part of her.

This was better. This was fair. She smiled and tugged at his pants. They laughed as she yanked off his shoes. He was laid out before her, like some carnal offering. He hadn't worn underwear, which made things tighten low in her body. She stared at him for what felt like hours. He never said a word, only waited for her to make the move. Clarke crawled towards her dream made flesh. He was really here.

She traced her fingers up his thighs and grazed he the head of him. She had read romance novels, but never been able to actually perform the act. She licked the tip of him and Bellamy barked out a sound. His thighs clenching in delicious tension. He looked down at her with hooded eyes as she took him into her mouth. She sucked him down as far as he would go. Bellamy placed his hands on her hair and tried not to scream in pleasure as she made love to him with her mouth.

Clarke loved the taste of him. He tasted like something dark, rich and spicy. Like cinnamon or cloves dipped in chocolate. He was thick and long and filled her completely. She tongued the underside of him and watched as his back arched. Bellamy tried to control himself, but in all honesty didn't think he could last long. The sight of him losing control more than anything did it for Clarke. She moaned as things low in her body curled and tightened. The vibrations from her voice travelled up Bellamys spine and he arched his back while crying out as he spilled over lips into her smiling mouth. Clarke swallowed all he had to give. She swallowed every drop of his love and came up for air watching him breathe so hard. His chest heaving up and down as his body tried to regain some semblance of coordinated movement.

Clarke crawled up to his face and kissed him. Bellamy sighed and kissed her back. "I'm not going to be of much use to you like this." He motioned to the aftershocks.

"We have time." Clarke murmured and kissed his nose. Her fingers traced the apples of his cheeks. She counted each freckle, each blemish, each scar. Everything about him was beautiful to her.

"I love you so much." He said his hand entwining with hers. "I will love you forever." He whispered, brining her hand to his lips. Clarke made him stop talking by kissing him. Bellamy rolled them over so he was on top of her. He braced himself on his forearms and stared at her. She was still fully clothed and he couldn't stop staring. Even clothed Clarke was the most beautiful thing he had ever seen.

He grasped her face and kissed her so deep she saw stars as her toes curled. Bellamy fingered the hem of her tshirt his fingers touched her her hip. The callouses of his fingers leaving a trail of sensation against her skin. She twitched in his arms, her body rolling to meet his expert hands.

Bellamy smiled as she made an involuntary sound as his thumb grazed the underside of her breast. He tugged the shirt over her head and threw it to the side. She unhooked her bra and released her bountiful mounds front their cage. Bellamy rubbed his hands lazily up and down her back and across her stomach, always almost touching her breasts but never quite getting there.

"Bellamy." She groaned as he tortured her. "You're killing me." She said through gritted teeth.

Bellamy smirked, "Turnabout is fair play. You just ended me a few seconds ago." He rumbled against her skin. Unbuttoning her jeans he slid them down her legs. She sighed as he rested his head on the hollow of her stomach and just breathed in her scent as his hands kept petting her.

Hooking his fingers in her underwear he dragged it down and tossed it away. He had to sit on his haunches and just look at her. She was so gorgeous there in the candlelight. A fierce feeling of loss enveloped him. This was their first time together and all he could think of was that he was losing her.

He raised her left leg and kissed her ankle as she giggled shyly. His lips travelled up her leg. He made sure to kiss her scar from the explosion with extra care. He wanted her to know that the scars only made her more beautiful to him. He licked at the uneven skin and made sure she understood that everything about her excited him. He moved over her to kiss the tops of her breast. Her hands rooted themselves in his hair and tugged his mouth to where she needed him. He tugged and played with each nipple enjoying the sounds she made for him. He suckled each one while playing with the other.

He had never been a choir boy. He had lost his virginity at fifteen to senior in class. Since then he had used women as something to enjoy and then throw them he always felt nothing. But with Clarke he was happy he had the experience. He wanted her to enjoy every second and never forget a moment. This was their night. Nothing else mattered. Not Wells, not Octavia, not Aurora, just each other.

Bellamy scooted down so her mound was right in front of his eyes. She was as beautiful there as she was everywhere else. He let his breath tickle her there. She gasped and clenched her thighs from the sensation. Bellamy rubbed he back of her knees and ran his hands along her thighs to calm her. He gently spread her legs so she laid open and bare in front of his hungry eyes.

Clarke looked down her body to see Bellamy staring hungrily at her. He looked like some kind of dark beast with his eyes hooded staring at her most intimate of parts.

"I'm going to kiss you here" He said, his voice held dark knowledge in it as his fingers ran along her outer lips. She shivered. Even though part of this experience frightened her, she was never afraid of Bellamy. He would never hurt her.

She nodded and watched as he wrapped both his arms around her thighs. Both his hand rest on either side of her hips. His hands were so large against her skin.

Bellamy smiled at the contrast in their skin colors. Clarke was porcelain white, like the softest marble. He was scarred and dark with dark eyes and dark hair. She was light and he was darkness. He tucked her legs on top of his shoulders as he maneuvered her to be there most comfortable. He didn't care about himself. She could whip him to death right now and he would die happy with her hands on him.

He moved downward and kissed her there. Clarke bowed up and grasped the edge of the blanket. Only Bellamy's grip on her on her hips and his hands on her stomach were the only thing that kept her from bucking away from his mouth in surprise and pleasure. She couldn't believe how strange and wonderful it felt to have Bellamy's lips on her core. She could barely breathe as he continued in slow languid strokes, teasing her to spread her legs widers. She could feel his lips break into a grin as he lapped at her like a cat that got into the cream. She began to tremble as he continued to do things with his tongue she did not think were humanly possible.

She felt him pull her apart and slip his thumb in, massaging her inner muscles. He chuckled as she arched her back and gasp as he found her clitoris and sucked and nibbled and continuing playing her like a violin. He licked and sucked and nibbled until she didn't think she could take anymore. She cried out as her eyes rolled back in her head. The orgasm took her by surprise, so much that she didn't remember him crawling back up to lay next to her and kissed her lightly. The essence of her still on his lips.

"That was…" she tried to find the words.

"A hell of a good time." He finished for her. She nodded and ran her fingers through his hair. He was panting as if he hand run a marathon and he hadn't even had his own fun. She trailed her hands down to his chest curling her hands in the wisps of hair on his pecs. Then following the wisps further down his belly to his happy place.

Bellamy met her eye as her fingers encircled him with gentle tenderness. When she gently squeezed his fluttered shut, but he made no move to touch her.

"Bellamy, I need you inside me." Her voice was just as dark as his had been. He opened his eyes. She saw such vulnerability, such fear in their depths. She finally understood why he didn't want to move. He didn't want the night to end, he wanted to lay there with her forever.

Clarke swallowed the tears and smiled at him, "Make love to me." She commanded.

Bellamy rolled her under him without meeting her eyes. He tucked his head and began to suckle at her. She knew he was trying to distance himself in he motions of giving her pleasure. If he took none for himself, if he didn't feel true pleasure with her then he couldn't miss what he never had.

"Bellamy, Bellamy." Clarke breathed. She took his head in her hands. Her fingers running through the curly mess of his hair. He fought her hold and bit down gentlyon her flesh to make her cry out.

"That's not fair." Clarke moaned as he tried to distract her from comforting him. Clarke moved slightly and dug her nails into Bellamy's hair. She meant for the hold to wrangle him into listening to her, but he was better at this game and leaned down to kiss her dizzy.

Clarke bit his lower lip hard enough to draw blood. He wasn't going to do this to them. Bellamy drew back and touched his lips where blood welled forth.

"You've got some teeth, Princess." He whispered.

Clarke met his eyes, "Don't leave me here alone. Be here with me. Love me. Don't go somewhere else." She demanded.

Bellamy's forehead dropped to breasts and he took deep breaths, "Clarke, if we do this I won't be able to live with myself seeing you with him." He breathed against her skin. She felt wetness against her skin. Bellamy cried silently against her, he didn't sob, didn't make a sound, just wept silently. He had been taught to hide his pain and it hurt so much to feel him do this.

Clarke reached under his chin and lifted his face so she could look at him. His gaze was transfixed on hers. "You will survive. You're so strong. You'll survive for Octavia and your mom. You'll be okay. I promise. Do you trust me, Bellamy?"

He nodded.

"Then love me, be here with me and I promise we'll both find a way to survive." Bellamy smiled and kissed his princess. She was right. They would figure it out. Clarke watched as Bellamy unwrapped a foil packet and placed the condom on himself.

He brought her knee up and pressed it slightly outward as he entered her. His eyes never leaving hers form a second. She gasped and titled her head back. It felt so different than it had with Cory. She felt loved, consumed by Bellamy. Bellamy reached behind her neck and tilted her head to meet his eyes, "Stay with me." He commanded and watched her eyes flutter, but stay fixed with his gaze as he thrust into her.

He placed his left forearm beside her head to brace himself and the other hand he used to hold her hip in place as he made love to her. His fingers dug into her skin with a bruising grip and she gasped as his swiveled his hips into her.

Her hands travelled down to his ass and she gripped it tightly. Bellamy shuddered as she dug his nails into his flesh. She was as desperate for him as he was for her. He kissed her everywhere he could reach, willing himself not to forget this moment, never forget the way she looked at this second.

Clark spasmed around him and cried out his name and he shuddered as he let everything go. He lost himself in her and forgot about all his responsibilities, all his duties, all his pain. Nothing mattered but her. He collapsed to the side of her panting.

Clarke was breathing deeply and still twitching from the aftershocks of her second orgasm of the night.

Bellamy kept his eyes locked on the ceiling when he said, "I love yo, Clarke."

Clarke turned to him and cuddled against his chest. He kissed the top of her head and pulled the blanket over them both. Reaching for his discarded pants he pulled out the small necklace.

"I know it's not much, but I got this for you." Clarke looked at the small jewel hanging from a silverc chain.

"Bellamy." She whispered, love causing her throat to close up.

"Do you like it?" He asked sheepishly.

She nodded wordlessly and put it on. Bellamy liked the way that it fit her. He pulled her closer and they Both fell asleep together holding each other.

* * *

So, I will admit, my ability to write lemons or sex scenes is not that great. I hope you enjoyed this little bit of bitter sweet because this story is going to turn dark...really dark in the next chapters. You have been warned. If you enjoyed or if you hated, please review. Love to hear everyone's thoughts.


	7. Chapter 7

Bellamy's punch landed solidly into the punching bag and he felt the punishment of punching with a closed fist as the backlash vibrated up through his arm. He swiveled on his feet and danced around the bag throwing uppercuts, jabs and strikes while Tim held the bag for him.

"Jesus, Bell. What did that bag ever do to you?" Tim joked.

Bellamy sighed and held the bag for Tim as he took his turn. They had put the punching bag up in a large closet off to the side of the training center to continue training while everyone set up for the celebration. Bellamy looked as some of the workers hung streamers and white lilies against the backdrop of the alter which had been created by using scaffolding to imitate steps.

"Gonna be some kind of party." Tim said following Bellamy's gaze.

"Whatever." Bellamy growled and threw another punch. The bag swung once and disconnected from its hanging device and crashed to the floor. Tim whistled in appreciation and helped Bellamy drag it off to the side.

"Damn, remind me not to piss you off." Tim stood next to him shirtless and breathed deep, "Nothing like the smell of pretension in the morning." Tim said dramatically and sniffed the air. Bellamy tried to smile, but couldn't. He had promised Clarke he would be there for her at the ceremony. She had told him that him being there would give her strength to go through it, but he didn't know if he could do it. Watch her walk towards a life filled with unhappiness because of him. He wouldn't be able to see her until the ceremony tonight anyways. She had been sequestered by the pre-wedding events

* * *

Bellamy fixed himself a glass of straight whiskey and sat down on the couch. The mood was gloomy in their home today.

Bellamy sipped his drink as Octavia said on the couch next to him silent.

"She's doing this for us." He whispered.

Octavia looked at him with tears in her eyes, "I know Bell. You explained it to me." Octavia already felt the weight of the guilt of being born, but now she was the cause of her brother's unhappiness and her best friend's loss of the love of her life. She didn't need reminding.

"She shouldn't have to do it." He said aloud. His voice growing more angry with every breath.

Octavia grasped her brother's hand, "She knows what she is doing. We'll be okay." She reassured him.

Bellamy didn't say anything, but when he reached for his glass by the side table it fell to the floor and shattered.

Octavia jumped up and rushed to the kitchen to get the broom. Bellamy crouched down and began to pick up he larger broken pieces soaked in whiskey.

Octavia squatted and began to sweep up the mess. Bellamy got on his knees, but when a piece sliced his finger open he cursed and jumped back. He looked at the blood on his fingers and looked at the shattered glass. _That's what I am without her. Just shattered pieces, useless._ A terrible cry of rage ripped through from his mouth and Bellamy punched the wall. The metal didn't give under the force of his hit and he collapsed to the floor. As he slid to the floor he felt himself break. He covered his face with his blood covered hands and just breathed trying not to lose it.

Octavia wrapped her arms around her big brother and held him as broke. She held him as he realized he could never have the only person he truly needed. She murmured soothing words in his ear rubbing circles on is back. It killed her to see her big, indestructible bother so hurting.

Bellamy sat up a little more and scrubbed at his eyes trying to wipe away any evidence of the tears, "Sorry you had to see that O." He said.

"Why? Everyone has problems Bell. Sometimes you have break down to build yourself back up." She patted his shoulder affectionately, "Let me fix you something to eat." She ran into the kitchen and began to cobble something together from their latest rations.

* * *

Clarke stood still as her mother arranged her veil. She kept fussing with her hair and Clarke had to contain her snort of disdain. She felt like some kind of mannequin done up int his ridiculous get up. The only thing that made her try to maintain her composure was that Wells probably had it as bad.

Her mother stopped and noticed the small necklace with the blue sapphire in the middle hanging from her neck, "Clarke, that's beautiful, is that your something blue?" She teased admiring the necklace.

"Yeah, I guess." Clarke said her fingers encircling the small gem. It was really her heart if she told the truth. This small token of Bellamy's love for her was the only thing helping her to survive this day.

 _For him._ She told herself.

* * *

Wells sat on the bench as the tailor altered his suit to fit his broad shoulders. He understood the benefits of this transaction, he even thought they might be worth it, but thinking about Clarke and Bellamy he felt like such an ass.

He had seen how happy Clarke had been lately. He even caught her humming one day at lunch. Clarke….humming…it just didn't happen. She really loved that guy and here she was willing to marry him to save the ark and their people.

"Jesus, this is fucked up." Wells exhaled as he ran his hands over his face. On the other hand, if he had to marry someone, he could do worse than his best friend. He thought about the wedding night and shuddered. He didn't even know if he could get through the ceremony, let alone that duty.

"It'll be alright son." His dad said as he placed a hand on his shoulder and sat next to him. Wells just nodded numbly and tried to keep calm.

* * *

Bellamy pulled on his cleaner cadet uniform. He hadn't worn this one since being first admitted into the training program. It was the uniform he would wear when he graduated. He tried to smooth down his hair, but it was useless.

Octavia saw him trying to make his hair look better in the small mirror in the kitchen and smiled. She took pity on his and handed him his official Cadet cap. It was a simple black baseball cap. Once he graduated he would get a helmet that only the guard was allowed to wear. Most didn't bother, but it was a privilege to even get one.

Bellamy shoved his hair under the cap and pulled his bangs out of the way and sighed. This was the best he could for Clarke. Octavia changed the channel not the monitor to the main new station and watched as views of the training center greeted her with white lilies, and pearl white silk draped over anything that wasn't breathing. The entire would be broadcast and replayed throughout the night. She hated to admit it, but she was so excited to watch it all.

"Good luck." Octavia said to her big brother, hoping he could handle it.

"Thanks O. Don't stay up too late." She nodded and curled up under a blanket.

* * *

Clarke tipped back the shot of tequila her mother had given her. Her mother intended for to sip it. _Like hell. I need another._ Clarke thought and poured herself another.

"That's enough of that young lady. I don't need you staggering down the aisle." Her mother said and took the bottle from her, but not before Clarke downed the second shot. "It's time." Abby breathed and ushered Clarke to the sliding doors. Clarke looked at all the people sitting, waiting for her to walk down the aisle and wanted to puke.

She fingered the sapphire and sighed as she tried to compose herself. She looked up and saw Wells fidgeting with his tie. Jaha, his best man, slapped his hands away and Wells rolled his eyes.

Clarke scanned the crowd and spotted the one person she was searching for. Against the far wall, where he was practically invisible was Bellamy. He was in his cadet uniform with a cap on, but she would recognize that relaxed stance anywhere. He raised his eyes to meet her and she saw the anguish he was in. She bit her lip not to burst into tears.

* * *

Bellamy looked up as Clarke spotted him. She looked nothing like herself. They had caked make up and bright red lipstick on her lips. She looked like something out of a damn fairytale with that getup on. He could practically hear the girls swooning in envy. That dress would be immortalized as the first part of the power alliance being made here.

It was Clarke, but she didn't look like his Clarke. That made it a little easier to bear. Her eyes were smudged with black and her blue eyes jumped out from her face. It didn't soften her look, it made her look demented. And there was too much white in her eyes, like she was straining just to keep her eyes in her head. But he heard all the sighs and gasps as they took her in.

She was still beautiful, but not his Clarke. The processional music began and she began to walk down the aisle. His heart started beating faster as she got closer to Wells. He gripped the picture of her and him that Octavia had drawn and held on like there was no tomorrow. Sheer force of will was the only thing stopping him from stealing a guard's gun and shooting Wells point blank.

Clarke reached the alter and he felt his knees get weak. This was actually going to happen. He was going to lose her, forever.

Clarke reached the alter and tried not to dry heave. The pastor said a few things and Clarke just nodded. Then Wells nodded, but his eyes kept darting around frantically.

Clarke mumbled the answers to all the questions the pastor asked and then Wells answered. They got to the part where the final big question was asked. To truly have and hold.

Clarke couldn't speak she just nodded. Wells turned to his father and then looked out at the sea of people watching him.

"Clarke, I'm sorry. I can't" He whispered.

Jaha placed his hand on his son's shoulder and tightened his grip, "Don't do this, son." Jaha warned.

"Please, Wells, we have to." Clarke begged, thinking of Bellamy and Octavia and her mother. "Please, don't do this."

"You don't love me. You love who you love, Dad." Wells turned to Jaha and handed him the wedding rings. "I won't do this." He said and walked down from the alter.

The crowd broke into a roar. Some people were crying, some getting angry and some were laughing. Jaha waved the hysterics down and said a speech about them being young and foolish and how his son would have to be careful about proposing so quickly from now on. The crowd broke out into laughter. Clarke didn't get the joke, but smiled for the cameras while also trying to keep her composure. She tried not to look at Bellamy while the cameras panned to her, but she couldn't help it. He was gone.

Abby sat next to Clarke on their couch. Clarke was thankfully out of that horrible get up, but Jaha had not been pleased.

"Darling, you did everything perfectly. Thelonius will not hold you responsible." She whispered and wrapped her arm around Clarke's shoulder.

 _Don't hold your breath on that one, Mom._ They both went to sleep.

* * *

Octavia was burst from the couch when Bellamy came in. She hugged him in congratulations. It was weird to be congratulated on a groom leaving a bride at the alter, but he accepted it and smiled.

"I knew she wouldn't marry him." Octavia said confidently.

"Actually, Clarke was going to go through with it, it was Wells who backed down." Bellamy explained. He didn't feel angry though. Definitely not angry at Clarke. The only reason she was going through with it was because she loved him. He held that reason close to his heart and sat down to listen to Octavia's opinions about the ceremony.

* * *

Clarke adjusted the IV on the patient currently getting fluids in the waiting room. She told her patient she would be right back with more fluids. Fluids was all she was able to prescribe these days.

She looked up when the door to the door opened and she saw Bellamy walking through it with a cup of coffee in hand.

"That can't be for me." She said reaching for the cup.

"No, it's for me." Bellamy teased and sipped from the cup.

"That's just mean. Just a sip?" Clarke pleaded sticking out her lower lip.

Bellamy smiled and handed the cup to her. Clarke took a sip and handed it back to him. "What are you doing here so early? Aren't you on shift?"

"They gave me the day off for some reason. Two days off in a row. I could get used to this." He said smiling.

Clarke reached up and kissed him lightly on the lips so thankful she still could. Bellamy cupped her face gently with one hand and kissed her back.

Bellamy turned when he heard the waiting room door open. Five guards along with the chancellor stepped through the door.

"Thelonius, what is this?" Abby Griffin asked stepping in front of her daughter. Bellamy pushed Clarke behind him as the guards stepped forward.

"Give us the room." Thelonius ordered the rest of the waiting patients out. They all left in a hurry. Clarke's current patient took the IV pole with her and ran down the hall.

"What are you doing? Clarke did everything she promised." Abby argued as a guard pulled her through the doorway.

"Mom! Let her go!" Clarke shouted from behind Bellamy. Bellamy held her back as she reached for her mother. He didn't know what was going on, but he knew he couldn't let the guards get near Clarke.

"I did everything you asked! I said I do, it's not my fault Wells backed out!" Clarke screamed from behind Bellamy, "Move Bellamy. I have to talk to the Chancellor." Clarke pushed at his back, but Bellamy didn't budge. He saw the Chancellor's face. He had seen that face before at floatings. It was a resigned face, whatever the decision, the Chancellor had already made it.

"Clarke, stay behind me." Bellamy said and pulled out his baton.

"Clarke Griffin, you are hereby accused of treason against the ark. You have been charged with drug trafficking. You are sentenced to the sky box until your trial." Jaha said, his voice leaving no doubt as to who was in charge. Bellamy's stomach dropped. They were using him as the excuse to arrest Clarke. _Damn him._ Bellamy thought as he stared ahead at the Chancellor.

"NO!" Abby screamed and lunged at Jaha. The guard who had pulled her away from Clarke grabbed her around the waist and cuffed her.

"Despite your absolute failure to follow through, the scandal was enough to distract people. I had hoped that you two could have a happy ending to distract the people, but it seems that only tragedy and gossip can enthrall them. The shock of it has been an even bigger distraction than a happy wedding would've been. You both did well in that regard, but I can't have you running around doing anything you wish." He turned his head to Shunway. "Follow procedure. Proceed." He commanded.

"Yes sir." Shumway said from behind the Chancellor. Shumway nodded to he guard closest to Bellamy who unsheathed his taser and twirled it like a spear with glee.

Bellamy knew full well that there would be no trial. Clarke would be floated quietly to keep the secrets. He couldn't let that happen.

Wells came bursting through the door and lunged at his father trying to grab him by the shoulders, "DAD! Don't do this. It's my fault." Wells shouted.

"Restrain my son. He'll be joining Clarke in the sky box." Jaha said as a guard snapped open his taser. Wells eyes shot to his father in disbelief.

"WELLS LOOK OUT!" Clarke screamed from behind Bellamy who was still shifting her out of reach from the other guards. They kept advancing, but he wasn't giving up without a fight.

Wells dodged the guard's first attempt to electrocute him, but the second time he caught Wells thigh and Wells went down. Clarke's hand curled into a claw in Bellamy's shirt as she pressed her head into his shoulder. She couldn't believe this was happening.

"Clarke, when I say, make a break for the door." Bellamy whispered removing her hand from his shirt. He needed to be free to move. Clarke shook her head. She knew the truth that Bellamy wasn't ready to admit. Even if she somehow got out of the room, there was nowhere to run to. The guard would eventually find her and it would be worse. She wasn't leaving him. "Clarke, now!" Bellamy shouted as he charged two of the guards. He kicked one to the floor and punched the other in the stomach. He slammed the third against the wall of the exam room. He got a few more hits in before one tased him and Bellamy went down twitching from the electricity coursing through his body making his nervous system malfunction. Clarke watched terrified as Bellamy hit the floor and lid helplessly while they hit him again and again with the taser. His eyes never left hers while his body twitched. _I failed her._ Was his only thought.

Shumway slammed Bellamy's body into the floor as he cuffed Bellamy, who was still twitching involuntarily. Shunway's knee dug into Bellamy's back and Bellamy grunted from the effort it took to breathe. Shumway held his head down and forced Bellamy to watch as one of the guard tased Clarke, who hadn't been resisting at all. She had put her hands up peacefully, but they still tased her again and again.

"She pays for your resistance." Shumway whispered in Bellamy's ear, "She resisted arrest." Shumway winked at the other guards who all nodded. Bellamy tried in vain to buck Shumway off his back. They kept tasing her until her body barely moved and she couldn't stop her body from releasing its contents. Bellamy gritted his teeth as urine spread across the front of her scrubs. They were killing her. Abby had been shouting things at Jaha the entire time, but she was silenced as the guard holding her backhanded her.

Bellamy met Clarke's eyes across the floor as she twitched and gasped from the pain. Clarke's eyes told him she knew she was going to die and she didn't care. Her hand outstretched towards him. Reaching for him, begging him not to give up. She couldn't bear to see that beaten look on his face. The guards laughed as Clarke tried to crawl towards Bellamy on her hands and knees. One took aim and kicked her in the stomach sending her sprawling against the cabinets.

"NO!" Abby screamed from the waiting room. The guard holding Clarke's mother slammed the butt of the taser into her skull and Abby went down. Wells tried to lunge for the guard, but the other guard holding him put him down with another taser. Any time Wells tried to get up, the guard tasered him until he lost consciousness.

"Clarke, stop." Bellamy wheezed as Clarke still tried to crawl towards him, cradling her stomach.

"Bell—" Clarke started before the other guard struck her with his foot. The strike landed in her lower back and she collapsed against the floor. She grunted, but didn't stop. Bellamy watched in horror as the next guard crushed her hand with his baton. _NO!_ He screamed inside his head. Clarke didn't cry out, but her breath whooshed out of her. He wouldn't cry out if she didn't. He would be strong for her.

Bellamy shut his eyes and gritted his teeth, trying not to watch, "Wow, this girl must like it rough." One of the guards joked as they all watched as Clarke, beaten half to death tried to pull herself along the floor towards Bellamy with only one good hand. Her bloody fingers tried to find purchase to pull herself forwards inch by inch. Her nails splitting and tearing from the effort.

Clarke's brain was on autopilot. After the first blow, she didn't know why, but she had to reach him. All she knew was that she had to touch Bellamy one last time. She knew she would never be released from the sky box. She knew they were going to float her, but she had to touch his face, one more time. If she had to die, she would rather be beaten to death by Bellamy Blake's side than be sent out into cold space to suffocate alone.

Bellamy screamed wordlessly as the last guard aimed and slammed his boot into her face. Clarke coughed as blood bubbled into the back of her throat and spurted from her nose. The last blow had thrown her onto her back. She was choking to death on her own blood and they still took aim at her.

Bellamy kept screaming as they continued to kick her, "STOP! PLEASE STOP!" Bellamy pleaded as Shumway kept his face pinned towards Clarke. Clarke was still breathing, but it came out as a gurgled wheeze.

Clarke was now on her back, she tried to pull enough air in to get one breath. The pain stabbed her like razors in her lungs and it was consuming her, but the sound that caused her to tilt her head was Bellamy's scream. It was so filled with helpless rage and pain that she had to look at him. Bellamy tried to shake his head away and not look, but Shumway made sure he couldn't look away. He couldn't watch them kill her. He didn't want these images burned into his memory.

"Please, baby, stop. Please Clarke." Bellamy begged her, his voice barely audible from screaming so much.

Clarke rolled her eyes to his. She was within reach now and she smiled. Her teeth covered in blood, she leaned forward and kissed him, "Love yo—"." Clarke tried to whisper. Bellamy trembled as his lips met hers. Clark's neck couldn't hold the weight of her head and slumped down. She went limp as her eyes rolled up into her head.

"Clarke?" Bellamy asked, but she was gone, unable to hear him. "No." His voice shuddered. Bellamy shut his eyes as Shumway released him.

"Take this one to the Sky box. If she dies on the way, then we'll document it as resisting arrest. This one, is to be held in the training center until both Wells and Clarke are secure in the sky box." Shumway said indicating Bellamy.

Clarke was so close. Bellamy strained and strained until his mouth was next to her ear. Shumway and the other guards were discussing details with Jaha, they paid no attention to him. Bellamy kissed her neck gently and spoke softly, "I will love you forever. Stay alive." He whispered and prayed that she heard him. Shumway jerked him upright and walked him back as Bellamy fought his hold.

"Never liked the bitch to begin with." Shumway sneered at Bellamy as he dragged the cadet out.

* * *

When I started this story, this was the scene that I had planned to end on. Because the next logical step is that Bellamy is demoted and hops on the drop ship, but I'm kind of thinking of continuing it.

If anyone is wondering where he inspiration for this scene came from, it came from Black Sails Ep 4X05 when my favorite character, Anne Bonny, kicks ass while getting the crap beat out of her. A little different here, but I wanted to pay homage to two strong women characters.

I know this is going to make some readers angry, but this is where the story led me. Please don't bash in the reviews, but please do review. More to come. Tell me what you think.


	8. Chapter 8

Bellamy sat his hands cuffed to the metal bench. He felt like it had been seconds since they had dragged him away from Clarke. In reality he was pretty sure it had been almost half a day.

He couldn't think about what was happening to Octavia or his mom. If he did he would lose it completely. The only thing keeping him from trying to kill Shunway was the fact that when they had taken Clarke, she was still breathing.

Abby Griffin sat next to Bellamy on the bench in the holding cell. She had known it was futile to struggle so they had removed her cuffs since she had behaved. Bellamy hadn't been as willing to cooperate and so they had literally chained him to the bench to keep him from beating at the bars.

"I see why she loves you." Abby whispered. She reached up and wiped his brow and smoothed down the wayward bangs that he had always owned. The kind gesture almost broke him. His mother did the same thing when she wanted to talk with him seriously. It must be a movement universal to all moms. "You two are complete opposites, but you compliment each other." Her eyes were shiny with unshed tears as she looked at the man her daughter loved. His hands were bleeding from fighting the cuffs to no avail whereas her baby had given up in the hopes of not getting anyone else hurt. Clarke would always self-sacrifice before she would ask anyone to fight for her. They had both bled for her poor decisions. Abby smiled sadly, she had her father's strength in her, down to the core. He was another strong person who had suffered for her deicsion.

Bellamy met her eyes. He could only meet one because Shumway had beat the shit out of him for resisting and one eye was swollen closed, "I failed her." His voice shook with emotion as he confessed his greatest sin.

Abby couldn't disagree with him, "We both did." She pulled out a small tube from her pocket. They had removed all of Bellamy's possessions, but not hers.

Bellamy shook away her attempts to spread the salve on his cheeks where the deepest gashes were.

She knew why he turned away from her help. He felt he deserved the pain. Abby took his face in her hands and turned him to meet her eyes, "I can't save her. Please let me help you at least." The fight died from him like a balloon deflated. Abby spread the salve and replaced the top and returned it to her pocket.

"I'm so sorry." He whispered. Abby couldn't stop the tears that fell. She was so sorry too. She wrapped her hands around his shoulder and hugged him. Trying to comfort them both. Bellamy leaned into her.

"She's alive. I know she is." She said and held him tighter while patting his shoulder the way he imagined she had patted Clarke in order to get her to buck up. Bellamy nodded against her shoulder. Hope the only thing keeping him upright.

Abby made him look at her again, "You have to survive for her. You understand me?" He nodded and leaned his head back against the cold metal.

Abby asked the guard for a cup of water. The guard seemed conflicted but handed it to her. She tilted the cup to Bellamy's lips and he swallowed grateful for the kindness. They had both been locked up so long without anything to eat or drink, but apparently even in a jail cell Abby Griffin commanded others just like her daughter.

* * *

Clarke wheezed on the floor her cell and looked at the ceiling. They hadn't even given her new clothes. She had been carried on a stretcher and dumped onto the floor of her current hell covered in blood and piss. They had searched her for weapons when they ascended into the sky box, but she knew how to hide things. Clarke gritted her teeth as she pulled the small shard of glass out of her cheek. She swallowed the blood that began to run down her throat; not like it was a taste she wasn't familiar with. She gripped the small weapon in her hand and smiled. The first guard that tried to touch her was going to get a nasty surprise. She would never be a victim again.

Her thoughts turned to Bellamy. He had fought so hard for her. She smiled and fingered the small necklace. They hadn't taken it from her. It had been tangled in her hair and they hadn't noticed it.

* * *

Bellamy continued to mop up the slop on the floor. It had been four months since he had seen O or Clarke.

Being a janitor sucked, but surprisingly they hadn't floated him. He was absolved of all charges, but he would never be a guard.

To him it didn't matter. The only things that mattered were Clarke and O. It had taken twelve weeks for him and Abby to use their connections to get him assigned to the right cell block. Through Abby, he was able to send letters to O. They wouldn't let him near her cell block. His last name was a dead giveaway. But his and Clarke's relationship had become old news after the wedding. Hardly anyone ever remembered it, so he could get assigned to her cell block.

Abby had used up all her favors to do it, but he smirked as he kept cleaned up the shit off the wall next to Clarke's cell. Hers was next.

Bellamy waited as they removed her. It took every ounce of control for him to stand still and watch as they dragged her out chained and slammed her down to her knees. She was alive, better than she had been when they had tried to kill her, but she was still hurt.

A fresh shiner purpled the skin under her left eye and she had a split lip, but her hand was bandaged and she looked better. Her matted hair was pulled into a ponytail. Bellamy had to stop his stomach from rolling up to spill out his mouth. They hadn't let her shower in months. She smelt like they hadn't given her much of a toilet either. She was being held in maximum security solitary. He hadn't expected it to be pretty, but this was brutal. He still had hope though. She was alive.

"Well, get to it!" One of the guards motioned to her cell. Bellamy nodded under his cap and he moved past Clarke to start cleaning up her cell.

He had expected her cell to be filthy. It was the opposite, immaculate and bare. Which only fueled his anger. She wasn't refusing showers, they weren't giving them to her on purpose, but she still kept her living space clean. Her cell wasn't disgusting and yet she looked like she came from the fourth circle of hell. The only thing out of place was the drawings along the walls and floors. She had sketched pictures of earth, portraits of her mother, him, and O.

The picture of Octavia smiling at Clarke threatened to break him. She still thought of them, after everything that had happened to her because of them. He ran his fingers over a sketch of Aurora.

"Hey man, why you dawdling?" The guard pressing Clarke down asked. She was still struggling against the chains like a wild animal.

"There's nothing to clean up." He said so quietly he didn't expect they heard him, but they did.

"Dude, clean off the walls. Those drawings are considered contraband and the chancellor has approved them being removed." The guard explained.

Clarke looked up. Her eyes went wide understanding the guards words. Her eyes traced the janitors form and she growled low on her throat, "Fuck you, Johnson." Her curse was directed at the guard that popped her on the head while she kicked at him. Her voice was rough, and deeper than he remembered. A stranger's voice, someone who screamed until their voice broke.

"Griffin, don't make me taser you. Play nice." She continued to fight harder against he restraining guard. Clarke was acting crazy, like she wasn't even there, nothing but a fierce animalistic urge to get free existed inside her now.

Bellamy sighed sadly and took a soap soaked sponge and began to erase her precious sketches; the only windows to the outside she had. He felt like he was erasing part of Clarke as he drowned the images in cleaner and wiped them away.

 _Just hold on a little longer, Clarke._ He thought as she continued to fight against her restraints as he took away the only thing she loved. Once he had finished he packed up and watched as they tossed her back into that empty hole of a room. She never even registered his presence. The cap covering his features and not being in normal clothes camoflouged him well. _She probably thinks she's lost everyone, including me._ He thought.

Clarke raged against the door as he was escorted out to the next cell block. But he would be back.

* * *

Bellamy slipped the guard a vial of steroids that Abby had procured for him. The guard took it and turned to leave Bellamy alone.

"Hey, open the door." Bellamy complained as the guard started to walk away.

"Hell no man. She is a high priority prisoner." His boot shot out and kicked the window that opened to give Clarke her food. "Only medics are allowed in. You can use this." He said indicating the small window.

Bellamy gritted his teeth but didn't start anything, it would only make matters worse for Clarke. Bellamy nodded, "You got ten minutes before shift change." The guard left after saying that.

Bellamy laid on the floor his face even with the window. "Clarke?" He asked his voice soft.

He heard shuffling inside the cell, but didn't see her.

"Clarke please, we only have ten minutes." He pleaded.

Clarke's face flashed in front of the window. Something inside Bellamy was healed when he saw two bright blue orbs staring back at him from the other side. He could take a breathe without it hurting for the first time in months, "Bellamy?" She croaked and reached her hand through the window to grasp his hand tightly. Bellamy brought her hand to his mouth.

"God I missed you." He breathed against her skin and kissed her broken hand softly. His lips were feather light as they touched the broken bones that were still healing. Luckily the bandage on her hand was wrapped lightly and he could still feel the heat from her skin beneath them. Her fingers lightly traced his stubble.

"What happened? Is my mom okay? Octavia? Your mom? What about Wells?" She asked frantically still caressing his face. She was touch starved and couldn't quit touching him. Her hand drifted to his hair where she ran her fingers through his unruly locks. Bellamy sighed in bliss, but tried not to get lost in the sensation. They had such little time.

"O is locked up, your mom is fine. She's stillworking with medical wing. Wells is on A block. And my mom…" Bellamy couldn't finish as the anger boiled up in him.

He didn't need to say anything, Clarke understood. They both knew who would be blamed for Octavia's birth. Aurora had been the only adult in charge of the decision and she had willingly damned herself to a floating to birth Octavia, "Oh, Bellamy. I'm so sorry." She breathed and her tried to hug him with one arm, but the angle was awkward and she couldn't do it. "Here, I need you to take this and keep it safe for me." She reached her hand back and pulled her out her necklace. She had been hiding it in a corner under a loose plate.

Bellamy nodded and shoved the necklace in his pocket.

"How much time do we have?" She asked.

Bellamy looked at his watch, "Not enough." He whispered. This time he reached into her cell and cupped her face and held his hand there as she sighed.

"I miss you. I love you." Clarke said tightly.

"Stay alive, you hear me. Don't let them break you. Something is going on that nobody will talk about, but your mom is hearing rumors. They talking about gathering prisoners for some kind of mission. I don't really understand it, but your mom is poking around." Clarke nodded with his hand still on her face. She turned her head and kissed his wrist lightly.

"You too. You have to survive for Octavia and I. Stay strong." Her voice broke on the last word.

Bellamy gritted his teeth, but didn't say anything. He pulled a wet rag from his pocket and fitted it through the hole. He gently wiped the grime and grit off her face and under her eyes. She sat still for him and tried not to flinch as his fingers traced the cuts on her face.

"There she is." Bellamy smiled as his Clarke shone through the dirt. Clarke took his hand and kissed it again before he had to leave.

"I'll be back. Survive." He commanded and pulled himself to his feet as a new shift of guards started to file in. He shut the window and began mopping the floor.

Clarke looked at the shut window and let the tears fall silently. She had put on a brace face for Bellamy, but she didn't know how much more she could take. She looked at the small piece of glass she kept hidden in the floor plate where she had also hidden her necklace. Only hours ago she had contemplated using that small piece of glass to cut into her neck. She knew how to cut and where. She would be gone before they could save her, she would be free. But that was before she saw Bellamy. He was alive, they hadn't floated him.

 _For him I won't break._

* * *

Again...sorry for the lame short chapter. I am having trouble finding a way to end this story. By the way, if anyone is interested I am on the hunt for a beta reader. I pump out lots of chapters way too fast and am usually too hyper to post them to triple check for grammatical mistakes. If you're interested, please PM me.

Anyways..hope you liked it. Please review. Thanks :D


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